What's black and white and red all over? Half a black face and half a white face after going through a blender

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What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

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An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

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How many cans does the average alcoholic drink in one night? None. Cans are solid and therefore cannot be drank.

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

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What is black, white and red all over? An interracial couple that has been shot and murdered.

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Knock Knock who's there? Steve Steve who? Steve. I already told you my name.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

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So a girl says "I want to be a banana when I grow up". She's set unrealistic goals and her parents fear she may be autistic.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

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race-car = rac-ecar

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Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

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One day a kid said to his mom: "Mom, I painted the bed sheets with your lipstick". So his mom got mad.

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*knock knock* i have diarrhea

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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What happend to the murderer who ate people? He was sent to jail for a number of years and now is having work done to stop him from eating people

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What do you call a joke that isn't funny? A joke that isn't funny.

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What's the correct way to eat spaghetti? Put it in your mouth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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