A black man, a chinese man, and a dog decide to have a race. Unfortunately, they are shot by a sniper on a roof while still in the planning stages.

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What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

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A man is going to sign up for life insurance, he is stabbed by a mugger on the way and spends his last breath in a puddle hating the cruel irony of his fate.

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What's worse than a completely overused anti-joke punchline? The Holocaust.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

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What's the difference bettween the holocaust and a bee, 6 million jews died during the holocaust. Bees make honey.

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The teacher asks Timmy "why is your cat at school today?" Timmy says, crying, "Because I heard my daddy say to my mommy, 'I'm going to eat that pussy when the kids leave.' so I'm saving him!"

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What do you call a black man driving an airplane? A pilot.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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A man lying in bed at night rolls over and starts rubbing his wife's back. She says, "Not tonight, honey, I have a headache." Her husband respected her wishes and went to sleep.

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What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

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your mama's so fat she wears big clothing

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What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

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How do you stop 5 black guys from raping one white girl? You call the police.

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How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

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Why was the man sad? His brother died.

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Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you pull its pants up

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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were you expecting a joke

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whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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