Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody is here, nobody would ever want to knock on the door of you. Yes, you. You reading these awful jokes.

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Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

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Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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What time is it? 2:47 PM.

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Why did the man ask his wife to make him a sandwich? He lost both of his arms in the war.

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What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

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Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? People that make dead baby jokes.

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I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNET! WELCOME TO FÅG! DIE X-FÅGGOT! XD Okay Fagneto`s roll me out of here, I am done with the super important last message to uh... You? No wait that sounds wrong, stop laughing you korean piece of... Seriously sorry I am drugged, you guys put enough valium in me to kill a cow, so please roll me out... I used to have a lot of korean friend you know, but then I killed them for being korea... seriously my fingers magically type shit when I am done, please roll me out of here, and fill that... Kundalini express? Is it me or did this get even more fagneto... Get me out of here now now now no

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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What advice did the cat give to the man? Nothing because it's a cat.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

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Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

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Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

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Why did the world end? Because of Jim Layhey's whispering winds of shit.

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Ask me if I care. Do you care? No.

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What do you call a red ballon? It depends on its color duh!

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An old asian woman is driving down the freeway a drunk driver merges into her lane. Everyone is ok because she keeps a safe distance behind.

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There are 3 types of people, those that can count and those who can not.

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Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

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"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

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My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

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an man of hispanic descent ran into a pole his white friends proceeded to laugh at him not because he was in pain, but because he was different

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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