A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what happened to the fat lady she went on a diet and is now skinny but she cant resist mcdonalds big macs so she quickly become fat

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call a muslim flying an airplane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!!!! lolooloL!OL!olO!LO!Lo!l!LO!L!O11P!lOL!oO!l

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

thumb_up thumb_down -29

whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

thumb_up thumb_down -29

And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

"the president is black, my lambo's blue..." no hes not, hes bi-racial.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Knock Knock Who's there? Ben, you just called me. Aren't we supposed to go jogging. Oh yea, I lost track of time. Is it cold out? Yea it is. You should bring a jacket. Alright, can you get me a water? Yea, no problem. Thankyou.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q: what is the most confusing day in the ghetto? A: fathers Day

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops