A man walks into a bar and takes a seat at the bar stool. He then proceeds to look over and said a man in a suit and tie open up the window , jumps, and begins to float in mid air. In amazement he approaches the man. He says " That's amazing! How do you do that?" The man in the suit and tie replies "Drink this liquid and you will be able to fly." The man with excitement quickly rushes to the window, opens it, and suddenly falls to his death. The bartender says to the man with the suit and tie " Superman, you're a real dick when your drunk."

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

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the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm bitten in half in your apple.

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Well I think that anti jokes are stupid.

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A blind man walks into a bar. The shopkeeper says, "the bar is nextdoor." The man walks out.

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Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

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why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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Why did the mokey board the westbound train? I said gray umbrella noodle head!

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? It's Doctor Green. I've got some bad news about your test results. Can I come in?

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

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A black man, a Mexican man, a white man, an Asian man, a priest, a rabbi, and a prostitute walk into a bar. It was a very popular bar.

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A woman stopped making sandwiches.

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

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what would george washington do if he was alive today? he would scream and scratch his coffiin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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