My Friend Philip had his lip removed today. he is just Phil now.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

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What did the Jamacian say to his friends? Yo me Rastas' on de cloud shroud atta boy 9PM we rizzle into da hitasses bar and we order us da drink of "grandpa's cough medicince" me tinks, who grees wid my view od oftaday Rastas?

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What do you call a Mexican policeman? Officer.

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Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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How do you take a shit?, by taking it to go.

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What did the snowman say to the other snowman? Do you smell carrots?

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whose a bitch? ian doyle's a bitch

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What do you call a college student who never studies? An irresponsible person

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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Whats blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz. Whats pink and fuzzy? Blue fuzz that's embarrassed.

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What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

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Obama = ebola

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Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

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Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

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PS3 has the exerrent technorogy and finersse to make excerrent gaming such as... ...ITS RIDGE RACER! RIIIIIIIIIDGE RACEEEEEEEEEEEER!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops