Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

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knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

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A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

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Q: What do you call a barn full of black people? A: Antique farm equipment.

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why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

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knock knock who`s there me oh come in

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How Does My cat have Sex? With Me.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like lead, I did a poo.

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? Pretty much anything.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

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What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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Kerry Katona becomes independent.

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Whats worse than tripping? Getting shot

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Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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What is just as important as Woman's Rights? Woman's Lefts, to maintain equality.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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