what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

Why did the dinosaurs die out? This is a long and debated subject, and as no one was alive back then and no solid evidence has been found to support any theories we can only wait.

What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

Yo momma so stupid, she failed the 2nd grade math

whats better than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees whats better than 1 baby nailed to 10 trees? 10 trees nailed to 1 baby

A black man and a white man walk into a job interview. Neither of them get the job due to lack of skill in the field.

what did the left eye say to the right eye? "eye" see you

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Your mom is so ugly that you should buy her a paper bag to cover her face because she is just so very unattractive that it burns mine and everyone else's eyes.

Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

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Knock Knock, Who's There? Not Ann Frank because she died in the Holocaust along with 6 million other innocent people.

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

How do you get rid of Herpes? You can't.

Why was the Jewish man in jail? He lit a local CVS on fire.

roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

A man gets home from work with red on his collar. His wife asks what it is. The man replies "I had sex with a young woman, your to old and you disqust me"

what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

A life-sized cardboard cut out of Justin Bieber was in a contest with a cut out of Liam Neeson. It was stiff competition.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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