When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

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What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Why did the man wear a mask He had low self-esteem, and was ashamed of his facial appearance

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Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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The chickens have become self-aware!

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Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

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Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there. Just kidding because today brought terminal cancer.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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my wifes star sign is cancer, kinda ironic how she died really..... she got eaten by a giant crab.

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There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

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what has 8 legs, is brown, and will bite you? my crap

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When life gives you Live Aid, celebrate the fact that you've just gone back in time 27 years and somehow cheated death temporarily.

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What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

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-Knock knok who's there? -Orange Orange who? -Orange you glad im an orange? ...I believe you have confused the noun "Orange" with the conjunction "aren't".

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Why was Jimmy upset? He wasn't.

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Tunechi

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There's a black man in my family tree. Therefore, I could be considered biracial.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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