Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

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A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

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Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

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why did the cow say baaaaa ? it was a stupid cow

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Dead girls can't say no.

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An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

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How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

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Why was the woman arrested for trying to have sex with a miner? Because he was on the job and her advances were completely unwanted.

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I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

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why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? because he was hit by the planes that hit twin towers

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How did the black man start his car? He turned on the emission and lightly leaned his foot on either the accelerator or reverse pedal, depending on the position of the car.

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

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What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

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This is a random Anti joke.

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How do mummies keep there secrets wrapped up? They are dead.

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Would you like to go to my jinga party, if you do save the date 9/11?

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Whats worse than the dole. The SRC!!!

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Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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