how to turn invisable. eat yourself

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What do you call a man with no legs, arms, or a head? A torso.

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You should put some sand in your vagina to make the crabs feel more at home.

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What's worse than a broke pencil TWO broken pencilz

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What do you get when you cross a Dachshund and a Nazi? Bestiality. Ew.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? A gameboy

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Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

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Have you tried Ethiopian food? -no -well it's really good

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Knock Knock! F*ck off

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Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

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Q- Why did spongbob go to Detroit? A- He didn't, spongbob is not real. And even if he was, Detroit is not a very popular tourist attraction.

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How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

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Sarah Palin.

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knock knock whos there santa santa who .....long pause he doesnt exist now go shoot urself

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Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

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Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting, he is very fond of animals and would never want to shoot them.

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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Who more attractive then you? No one your ugly as pooh.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

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What did the man say to th tiger? Nothing, a tiger is a dangerous and vicious animal. It then ripped him to pieces. Is family mourned after for a very long time till they came to grips with the death of the main income in their family. Aids

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesnt rhyme And your entire family died trying to fly to your house for Christmas. They crashed into a orpanage for death children. There were no survivors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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