how much fish could a chicken

whats white and sticky? a white stick

Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

What's red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple? The Color Wheel.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

Q: What happens when a Jew with a boner runs into a wall? A: He breaks his nose.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

scraggle is in you pillow case

How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

Why did the man stop running. He was tierd

Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

An Irish man sips at a large beer. Oh yeah and your mother's a whore.

My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

What did the magician say to the little boy after he "cut" his mother in half. She is dead now. Your dad is on Row 4, he is crying.

fridge

What goes up a hill with 4 legs and comes down with 3? A horse, which, upon reaching the top of the hill, has one of its legs chopped off, which is when the horse proceeds down the hill.

Max Head fingered himself, HAH

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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