im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

What do you call a black person pimping out his bitches? a dog breeder.

What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

What does a blond do when she stops at a red light? She gets arrested.

Why did the parents tell their adopted son to go to bed? He was awake long after he should've been, according to the rules in their household.

How do you get a bent nail out of a board? You carefully pry it out with the back of the hammer.

why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

You should get a new joke book............ because the newest edition has just be released

Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck a poetry now show me your tits!!!

"Is this the Krusty Krab ?" I'M TIRED OF YOUR SHIT TYRONE.

What do you call a Mexican in the sand? A churro! (not trying to be racist, I'm even Mexican)

What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut... A Heart Attack.

how do you win a game try your best

If your fighting an octopus on mars how many lamps does it take to repair a dog house? Nine because a toaster cannot ride a bicycle.

Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and about not being funny.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

Where did Suzy go after the explosion? - Everywhere.

What do you call a woman between two houses? Her name.

What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

A woman walks up to a man in a supermarket and asks him where she can find the potatos. He says "I think they are all the way at the end on aisle 3" "Thanks" she says. Then she gets to aisle 3, and there aint no potatos!!!!

ATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

There's a 4 door kayak going down the street and it loses a wing. How many doughnuts fit in a dog house? And remember its not yellow, because snakes don't have armpits.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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