Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

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How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

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were you expecting a joke

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How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

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A man was walking through the woods when he comes across a little girl crying by a lake. "What is the matter little girl?" he asked. "My cat fell in the lake ... and it couldn't swim ... so my father jumped in as well and drowned too," she cried," Sad, the man sighed, pulled down his pants and said, "Well I guess today's just not your day,"

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A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

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What's worse than depression? Having depression and killing yourself

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his forehead. Why did the little boy have a frog stapled to his forehead? Because Johnny just can't drive. Why can't Johnny drive? He has no arms and legs. Why does Johnny have no arms and legs? Cause Johnny is a potato! Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? Because he got ran over by a bus. But who was driving the bus? Johnny the potato!

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Guess what?..... I once saw a black man who had a job that wasnt on work release........

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Who's Micheal Jackson?

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What is purple, stupid, gay, and tells shitty jokes? I don't know. You think of something.

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Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

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Mum did you make my milkshake? No, I didn't son, but your father did. Fther's dead. I know.

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What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

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I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Once upon a time there was a king who had a daughter. She eventually grew up and contracted aids got run over by a bus and shit her pants..

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why did the kitten not eat its food? because its face was stapled to the floor.

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Why did the pengoon cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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what goes ha ha ha ..plop? We are all going to die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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