What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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This is Mr.Bear you all are on rtc for the next week. See me in G7 NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why was Joe afraid of Steve? Because Steve raped and killed all of Joe's three children two weeks ago.

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Why was the chicken angry? Because he was tired of everyone questioning his motives.

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What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

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human centipede

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

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Don't you hate it when someone starts a sentence and doesnt fi...

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welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

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Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Conscience. Conscience who? Oh, sorry about that Hitler, you wouldn't know who I am.

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Q: How do you keep an idiot in suspense? A:

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Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

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what is the difference between a baby and a book... The book still has a spine

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Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

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Why was the blonde so stupid? She suffers a severe case of retardation.

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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-Knock knok who's there? -Orange Orange who? -Orange you glad im an orange? ...I believe you have confused the noun "Orange" with the conjunction "aren't".

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why do you park in the driveway and drive on the park way

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A man walks up to you and asks you:"What's funnier than a dead baby?" and then smiles, you then proceed to frown and tell him he needs to seek help. The next day you see his face on your TV

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What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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