Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

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Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

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What's annoying and wears glasses? The kid next to you

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I scream, you scream, we all scream when hit by an ice cream truck

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Q: Why was the child sad? A: because a doctor was taking bullet fragments out of his chest.

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Q.sam is 18 years old, why can't she get her licence? A.because Sam is a lost dog on the street

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What did the muslim say when he boarded the plane? Where is my seat

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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what do you call a black guy african american

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Why's it so bad to be black and Jewish? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

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say it ten times fast: oh

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Evan Ramsey hahaha go CAD

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What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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Q: What's the difference between Rush Limbaugh and the Hindenburg? A: One is a huge, flaming, Nazi gasbag, and the other is a drug-addicted talkshow host.

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Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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What caused the man to become blind? He took an arrow to the knee.

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What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

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Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

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Why did the bunny cross the road? Because it waited until a car was driving by and then got run over.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops