Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

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what did the guy say on friday ? ah man im so glad its not monday tuesday wednesday thursday friday saturday sunday he then threw a horse at a plane while moonwalking on a star that was riding a duck that was on a rabbit. Sir jumpalot was working overtime as he had to pay for a free phone

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

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Q:What's the greatest part about having sex with twenty five year old girls? A: There's 20 of them

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Two men walk into a bar. You would think at least one of them would've seen it.

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try to find the 1 thumbs up if you find it! 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thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why do black people love kool aid? It is cools them down on a warm summer day and it tastes great! OHHHH YEAAAAHHHHH

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the book say to it's reader? What are you stupid? People who read can't hear!

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Listen Nero, I understand now that this is your real name, actually I know where you live thanks to the good old phonebook... ...My order is fully based on respecting and treating all living beings equally and focusing on actually putting old notions such as Gods and superstition away in order to strengthen humankind`s belief in itself and others. As for Nerometal, well, that was one of my... Lesser followers, I assure you they have been taken care off, they will not be bothering you ever again. What would it take for you to forgive our transgressions? Money? Power? Ask and you shall receive, as far as your identity goes, you shall have it back and I shall use another site in the future.

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Wanna hear a joke? Your life.

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A blond is walking down the street when she is suddenly mugged and raped. She reports her attacker but he is never found.

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

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Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

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What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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What is big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

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I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

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Micheal Curran...that is all.

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What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

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A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

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How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

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Q. What do you call a bashed black man laying on pavement? A. Neapolitan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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