Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

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How do you get Jack to fall of his bike? Push him off

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a porch? Bob

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What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb? How many? How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb?

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What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

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A unicorn is walking down the street and a man asks him: "Why so horny" The unicorn then slap the man upside the head because that was none of his business.

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what do Asian people eat? what Asian people eat.

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What do you tell a woman with no black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice but you're not an abusive partner.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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My cousins so stupid she makes straight A's

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Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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Q: What do you get when an angry black man walks past you. A: You get a promotion, the black guy was your friend Bob and he had just been suspended for failing to follow police protocol when apprehending a suspect.

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Why did the man scream? He got his dick caught. In the zipper.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Never mind, it's just an imaginary door anyway.

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9/11.

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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o | ,'~'. / \ | ____|_ | '___,,_' .----------------. | ||(o |o)| ( KILL ALL HUMANS! ) | ------- ,----------------' | _____| -' \ '####, ------- /________\ ( ) |) '_ ' ,------|\ _ /_ / | |_\ || /_ /| | o| _\ _|| /_ / | | |\ _\____//' | ( ( | | | (_,_,_,____/ \ _\ | ------| \ _\|_________| \ _\ \__\\__\ |__| |__||__| ||/__/ |__||__| |__||__| |__||__| /__)/__) /__//__/ /__//__/ /__//__/. .' '. '. (_kOs____)____)

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Do you want to hear a joke about dogs? A joke about dogs.

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Acouple of grammer nazis walk into a bar & 'their' treated very poorly.

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What did Obama do when he heard of Bin Ladins death? He informed the nation of what had happend.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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