What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

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What is as dry as a bone? A bone

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whats blue and fluffy ? Blue fluff

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The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

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How is a Jew and a White Person alike. 'cuz you touch yourself.

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What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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guess what?

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Why did the man scream? He got his dick caught. In the zipper.

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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What's the difference between Santa Clause and Tiger Woods? One is a mythical person who parents exploit to get their children to behave due to lack of parenting skills.

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Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor

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What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

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Why was Hitler a bad person? He cheated at boggle.

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A black man without problems.

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its head.

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How do you lock out a Chinese Person? Lock the door

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Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

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what color is blue? green

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What's long brown and sticky? S**t

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Two robots are walking down the street together and walk into a bar. Just kidding, they can't walk because they have Polio.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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