What is brown and smells like bacon? Bacon

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What did the racist guy say at the baseball game? I am at a baseball game.

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How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

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Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

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How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

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who just made fun of katie matt

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Why did the Russian take a boat ride? Well this isn't possible because we all know that in Soviet Russia, boat ride you.

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roses are red violets are blue ill cut your dick off and use it as glue

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Knock knock. Who's there? The landlord. You're being evicted.

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What's 1+1? 4.

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Why is Travis so hilarious? ....Trick question hes not.

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How do you lock out a Chinese Person? Lock the door

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Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

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Why did Tigger look into the toilet? He accidentally swallowed a dime the other day and wanted to keep an eye out for it.

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Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

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What did Obama do when he heard of Bin Ladins death? He informed the nation of what had happend.

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What's brown? My toilet hahaha

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Q :What do you call a cow running through a field? A: Bob

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what was the funniest part of the titanic sinking? nothing, many innocent people were killed and left their family devastated.

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Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

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What is funnier than shooting a man in the face? Most things, shooting a man in the face is a terrible crime.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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You and your wife walk into a bar, you both order a drink and celebrate your good health.

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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