What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine [Emo Philips]

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what was the funniest part of the titanic sinking? nothing, many innocent people were killed and left their family devastated.

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What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

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What was wrong with the black guy? He was black

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Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

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If a stick is sticky and a bat is batty, what is a mountain? A mountain is rocky. Techinically, 'mountainly' is not an official word.

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Q: What did the Asian say to the Jew? A: Nothing. They were both anti-social and preferred to stray from face-to-face conversations.

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Why doesn't the Athiest wear socks? He has a minor fungal condition on his feet.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

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A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

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You and your wife walk into a bar, you both order a drink and celebrate your good health.

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Popsicles

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why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

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On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

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A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

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What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

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What does a car and a t-shirt have in common? Nothing.

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What do you call a black man without a job? A man disenfranchised by the failing American economy.

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What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

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Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

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Lets see how many dislikes this can get.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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