what did the homeless boy do when he saw a cup of water? threw it in someones face

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A Homosexual, a Jew and a Black walk into a bar. They do not speak make eye contact or acknowledge each other in any way.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A fairly-priced Apple computer.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What was Michael Jackson doing at the Dermatologist's office? He was getting a mole on his back examined to be sure it wasn't cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

The AIDS patient was gay

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's black and white and red all over? A bleeding penguin.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died

thumb_up thumb_down +15

There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was the legless man out of his wheelchair? He fell down some stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats a cat? A cat!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what do Asian people eat? what Asian people eat.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

I have a knock knock joke. You start.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the kid want money? So he could buy pokemon cards.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

a Jewish preist grew up in a black family. what do you call them? a loving family.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What happened to Kim when she went swimming? She didn't, she doesn't know how to swim.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mama's teeth are so yellow, she decided to invest in a teeth whitening procedure and begin a healthier dental hygiene regimen.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's my favorite color?? I don't have one, i'm a joke you idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops