A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

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A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

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A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

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Like my status for a tbh?

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What didn't last long? You in the bed

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Three blondes were stuck on an island, one of them wished for a motorboat, later on they all died of starvation

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Knock knock "Steve I have a door bell."

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how do you tell a joke on anti-joke? you don't.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because not only was she deaf and dumb, but she was also blind and it's not possible to drive if you are blind.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

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Yo Mama is so fat She wears XL clothes.

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What do you call a black man without a job? A man disenfranchised by the failing American economy.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree there was no monkey

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How do you make someone to go away from you? You rap3 them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rap3 him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rap3 him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

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worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

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why was the vampire sad? his last victim had aids.

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What did Jesus get for Christmas? Birthday presents.

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Lacrosse

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What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

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What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? Nigger

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Why is the ANTIJOKE symbol 2 mask faces crying? Because some people don't know how to write a good joke.

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A unicorn is walking down the street and a man asks him: "Why so horny" The unicorn then slap the man upside the head because that was none of his business.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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