How do you kill a clown shoot it in the face

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is the difference between Jews and the boyscouts? The boyscouts come home from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock, knock. Who's there? Nick. Nick who? Nick Wyatt

thumb_up thumb_down

when two guys walk in somewhere late together you say. hay perv hay ert.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two men walk into a bar. Seeing as the first man could have suffered a concussion, and been seriously hurt, The second man ducks to avoid also being hit by the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Obama 2012

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A straight man walks into a lesbian bar. He quickly realizes his mistake and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

So a magician was driving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the man say to the other man? Nothing, they didn't know each other..

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No...........

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A semi-coherent black man was wandering down the street toward an open garbage receptacle. Immediately an angry, filthy raccoon jumped up, hissing and baring its fangs, as if to defend its territory against the startled negro. This happened four times in a row. Each time it was either a negro, a mexican, a crippled kid or a person of jewish ancestry. Each time the raccoon hissed viciously. Coincidence? No. The raccoon was obviously very hungry and attempting to defend its last remaining refuge of territory from the ever-increasing encroachment of man's filth into the formerly natural and pristine spaces where wildlife once lived. He is now reduced to hissing at the ethnics and the cripples, just to eek out a pitiful subsistence on trash.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Love is in the air? Wrong. Nitrogen, Oxygen and Carbon Dioxide are in the air.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man comes home from the office, walks inside and hangs up his coat and hat at the door. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife has not made dinner instead she is drinking with friends, she tells him that she would have made dinner but she didnt want to. Furious, the man storms to the door, grabs his coat and leaves... He gets in his car and drives down to the pub. Sitting there drinking his beer, trying to calm down he finds a peice of paper tucked into his coat pocket, he unfolds it and reads it. It turns out to be a memo he wrote to remind himself at work that day.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

So this blonde walks into a library.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -108

I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

thumb_up thumb_down -116

What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

thumb_up thumb_down +69

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops