Today, I had intercourse with a teddy bear

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

So, a black guy walked into a bar. "Ouch," he said.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Cnorris can carry very heavy objects

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's wrong with the muffler man? his body.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: what do you call a guy named Aaron? A: Aaron

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? A mexican is a human being while a bench is an inanimate object.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

thumb_up thumb_down +1

how do you make a fat black man cry? Rape his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the three-leaf clover say to the four-leaf clover? "FREAK!"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call an Iraqi man steering the plane? a pilot, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor

thumb_up thumb_down -15

FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

thumb_up thumb_down -31

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What's long brown and sticky? S**t

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

thumb_up thumb_down -115

How do you make a little girl cry? Throw a brick at her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Q: What is creepy and stares at you when you sleep A: Me

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Sean Nuneviller look him up, he's cute.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

what did the homeless boy do when he saw a cup of water? threw it in someones face

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What didn't last long? You in the bed

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops