What did Helen Keller get at the store? Glasses

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How do you keep a dog from barking? Kill it.

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What did the vegetarian eat for christmas? Food.

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Why was the farmer buried in a grave on the top of a hill? He had died and this would be his final resting place.

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Rick Perry.

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where do you find a dog with no brain? in its grave.

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A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

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What's wrong with the muffler man? his body.

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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Your momma so fat she can eat 10 of your 300lb friends.

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Are you from Jamacia? Because I want to have sex with you.

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What do you call a man that is half Chinese and half Irish? Whatever you want, he's deaf so he won't be able to hear you anyway.

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Why did the plain crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He was Jewish.

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What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

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Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

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What's the difference between Santa Clause and Tiger Woods? One is a mythical person who parents exploit to get their children to behave due to lack of parenting skills.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Probably nothing

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a guy is driving home his wife calls him and she say's be careful there is a lunatic driving on the wrong side of the road towards traffic he then reply saying they all are

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

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Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

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9/11

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What did the Hindenburg say? -nothing it just blew up

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How many fairies does it take to screw in a light bulb? If you still believe in fairies, there's something wrong with you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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