Father: Son stop masterbating u might go blind Son: But Dad I'm over here

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor

Knock knock, Whos there Nig.ger Nig.ger who Fu.ck all nig.gers.

How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

Poop.

why was the man sad? His mom was killed in a car accident. His wife commited suicide? His kids were drowned in the bathtub by their mother before she commited suicide. But he was sad because he forgot to take his depression medication.

YOLO

This is a joke for Homeless people:

why do giraffes have long necks? because their heads are a long way from their bodies

MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

What do you pull when it's hailing. Your favorite electronic.

Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

Why was the mother crying Her son was killed by a meteor

What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

You're on fire.

A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

why did the shark cross the road It didn't its a shark

KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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