Do u know what would be a big pain in the ass? A thorn

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A straight man walks into a lesbian bar. He quickly realizes his mistake and leaves.

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So a magician was driving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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A man walks into a bar. His alcoholism is destroying his family.

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1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

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Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

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what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

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why did the man die? he got shot

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

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What did one Rhino say to the other? My, I'm sure glad we found this decadent watering-hole.

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A semi-coherent black man was wandering down the street toward an open garbage receptacle. Immediately an angry, filthy raccoon jumped up, hissing and baring its fangs, as if to defend its territory against the startled negro. This happened four times in a row. Each time it was either a negro, a mexican, a crippled kid or a person of jewish ancestry. Each time the raccoon hissed viciously. Coincidence? No. The raccoon was obviously very hungry and attempting to defend its last remaining refuge of territory from the ever-increasing encroachment of man's filth into the formerly natural and pristine spaces where wildlife once lived. He is now reduced to hissing at the ethnics and the cripples, just to eek out a pitiful subsistence on trash.

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What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

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Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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i saw a garbage truck it had garbage in it

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Why are girls large and round? Because they are raised by wild packs of oompa loompas.

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Love is in the air? Wrong. Nitrogen, Oxygen and Carbon Dioxide are in the air.

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9/11.

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Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

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What happens when you cut Chuck Norris? He bleeds

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What happened to Kim when she went swimming? She didn't, she doesn't know how to swim.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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