What's green and fuzzy and has legs that would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

2 guys walk into a bar. You'd hink one of them should have seen it. After all, it is a large building.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Hola.

there are 2 muffins in an oven they are cooked nicely and served as a tasty dessert

What's worst then not getting anything on Christmas? Rape, Murder, Dying.

how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

so the guy @ the asian restaurant ask the waiter why his beverage tastes funny and the asian waiter says "It's likely that you are used to classic coke and they changed the formula"

Where does a hobo live? A box.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, in fact, the "road" in this joke symbolizes the Mexican/American border. The chicken's real name is Esteban Jimenez and he crossed the "road" to reach his family on the other side so he can start his life over. In addition to this, Esteban's real dream was to establish a 401k and possibly go to law school so he could begin his own law firm.

whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

what happened to the boy who asked for a hit from the bong? he got punched in the face.

why was the vampire sad? his last victim had aids.

Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

What is the difference between a Jew and a canoe? A canoe tips.

Yah? Well your a ********

a woman walks into a stall with her five yr old daughter. as the mom starts to due her buisness the girl looks down and asks her mom "Mommy why do u have a beard on ur pe-pe?"

A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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