A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? He was hit by a bus

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died

Ran into my ex last night, so I put my truck in reverse and did it again.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have AIDS, Now you do too!

Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

69.... is a number

How did the little boy survive war? He respawned at his teams side of the map

Knock knock, Whos there Nig.ger Nig.ger who Fu.ck all nig.gers.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a snake in your liver. Because that could be hazardous to your health.

Poop.

this going to be my new text thingy! i dont have a phone! WATS UP!

What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Doesn't matter, the lightbulb was never out

Three guys and 4 Catholics are in a bar. They guys are making a joke. The first one says I'm gonna go to Oregon there's no Catholics there and the second one says I'm gonna go to Ohio there is no Catholics there and the third one says I'm gonna go to Alaska there's no Catholics there and one of the Catholics walk up and say how about you go to hell theres no Catholics there.

What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

Why do they call it lunchmeat? Because it is meat that you eat at lunch.

Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

A man walks into a Library and asks for a book on suicide. The Librarian says: "Do you have a library card?" The man says no and applies for one.

What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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