What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

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What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

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Yo Mama is so fat She wears XL clothes.

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Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

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What did Shakespeare say to the software designer? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A manufacturing defect in the chain link fence released several chickens who are now freely roaming the area.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because not only was she deaf and dumb, but she was also blind and it's not possible to drive if you are blind.

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

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What's black and white, and red all over ? An interracial couple who were both gruesomely decapitated in a freak car accident.

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Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

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How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

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Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

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what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

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Do unto others as others would do unto you, said the rapist.

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

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What did one pole say to the other pole? We are both from poland

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

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when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a picnic table? The average picnic table can support a family of four, while a Mexican person, depending on his or her career, can support families that include over four people.

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What is better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

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What starts with "p" and ends with "orn" Popcorn

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When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops