How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Whats white and cant jump? A refridgerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q. What's like a square block of ice? A. A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q- why are anti-jokes funny? A- cuz

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the man say to the other man? Nothing, they didn't know each other..

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Lacrosse

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a fish with no eye? A fsh

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Weird, orange is my favorite color.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops