Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

A fairly-priced Apple computer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

how do you own a ginger? you don't nobody wants them.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

when two guys walk in somewhere late together you say. hay perv hay ert.

Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

Hey, you have small hands.

knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

Gay rights

69.... is a number

What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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