Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

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when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

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Ran into my ex last night, so I put my truck in reverse and did it again.

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what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

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My nipple is bleeding

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why do black people were white shirts?..they feel like it

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did the dog explode? because it didn't have a bum hole

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nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

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What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

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69.... is a number

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A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

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Guess what? SHADAP

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how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

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Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where is my tractor?"

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Your mom is so fat she has type 2 diabetes.

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Why did the milkman wear a white belt? To keep his pants up.

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Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

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Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

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three men walked into a bar, the fourth one ducked

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A manufacturing defect in the chain link fence released several chickens who are now freely roaming the area.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops