what happens when you wake up inception

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Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

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what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

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What do you call a fish with no eye? A fsh

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What's worse than going to boot camp? - going to concentration camp.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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A guy walks into a bar, and then orders a jack and coke.

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A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

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What is Mario's favorite food? I don't know. You should ask him.

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why do black people were white shirts?..they feel like it

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Your mama's teeth are so yellow, she decided to invest in a teeth whitening procedure and begin a healthier dental hygiene regimen.

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What do you call 2 black men next to me. 2 Dead Men

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Knock knock, Whos there Nig.ger Nig.ger who Fu.ck all nig.gers.

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black

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A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

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Why did the plane crashed? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

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Why couldn't the car drive? Because its wheels were made of butter.

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What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

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how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Doesn't matter, the lightbulb was never out

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Three guys and 4 Catholics are in a bar. They guys are making a joke. The first one says I'm gonna go to Oregon there's no Catholics there and the second one says I'm gonna go to Ohio there is no Catholics there and the third one says I'm gonna go to Alaska there's no Catholics there and one of the Catholics walk up and say how about you go to hell theres no Catholics there.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops