Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Chuck Norris witnessed a crime.What did he really witness? A Jehovah's witness. xD

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call an Iraqi man steering the plane? a pilot, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why is Travis so hilarious? ....Trick question hes not.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A blond walks into a bar. She orders a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -98

what did Tyrone get for Christmas he got shot by isis

thumb_up thumb_down -132

How do you make a little girl cry? Throw a brick at her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Q: What is creepy and stares at you when you sleep A: Me

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

thumb_up thumb_down +51

A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Barack Obama walks into a KKK meeting. Everyone in the meeting is shocked, and no one says a thing out of sheer embarrassment because racism is no longer socially acceptable.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A jew, a black man, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Englishman, an American, and a muslim walk into a bar. They discuss their racial, political and religious opinions and walk away after a pleasant evening.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

thumb_up thumb_down +29

why did the monkey fall out of the tree there was no monkey

thumb_up thumb_down +27

"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops