What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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In Soviet Russia its very cold

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Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

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where did the black person go poop ? in the toilet!

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Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Who. Who who? ... Who?

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Why do Jews hate hitler? They are jealous of him.

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clamidia

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11111

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What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

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Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

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Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

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How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

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Your mommas so poor she can't afford food for her child. Thats you.

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how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

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Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

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A man walks into a bar. Inside he finds Hitler, his wife, and an angry badger. They are pleased to see him and they all relate to each other through their shared love of bocce ball.

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What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

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What's worse then burning in hell for eternity? Well, a lot considering hell is a made-up place.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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