How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

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knock knock. no one's home..

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Q: Why'd the chicken cross the road? A: to get to the other side

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

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Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

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What's green and has four wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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A boy dares his friend to jump off the walking bridge. The boy's friend accepts the dare and jumps. What happens next? The boy brain is splattered on the ground.

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What's bad for your teeth? A brick

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anti-joke teehee

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What is even bigger than an elephant? A gi-ant! (Wait you did say an anty joke right!?)

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Why couldn't Prince William go to the party? Because his WIFE bought tickets to the f**cking ballet.

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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If you live in the 'living' room, what do you do in the others? You die.

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2 guys are best friends from birth, one goes crazy and kills the others family and feel hatred towards each other for eternity.

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What do homosexual men do during sex? I don't know, but if you want to, I suggest you ask one of them.

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What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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LALALALA MUSIC MACHINE

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Q:Want to hear a pizza joke? A: Never mind it's to cheesy.

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knock knock whose there?? seth oh, come in

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Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

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Rebecca Black's new album.

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My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops