A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

Knock knock whos there? me oh, cool... well come in.

Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

where did the black person go poop ? in the toilet!

What's the difference between a duck A chair Vests have no sleeves

What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fsh

A Mexican, and Arab and an American are on a plane. The the plane is going down. It hits a mountain and crashes. But there was also a lot of other people on the plane. Families, children, loved ones. It was huge a disaster.

why did the pile of rocks cross the road? they were stuffed down the chickens throat

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride in a poop poop fart turd fart, dildo

Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

why does the octopus have no friends? because they're anti social by nature

What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

Who owns the streets of Comton The mayor

What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Q: What do African Americans and Doorknobs have in common? A: Before the Emancipation Proclamation was passed, neither was free. Doorknobs still aren't free.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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