A black guy gets arrested...

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

A guy walks into a bar, orders a beer, pays, and leaves.

What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

What's green and has four wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

Question 1 - What is 1 + 1 = Hospital

What's bad for your teeth? A brick

Q: How many Chuck Norrises does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: negitave 999999999999999999e

Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! That is a joke which very few people would find even mildly entertaining.

Your momma so fat she can eat 10 of your 300lb friends.

I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

Q:Want to hear a pizza joke? A: Never mind it's to cheesy.

A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: Yes. A: Thanks.

how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

Knock knock whos there? me oh, cool... well come in.

Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

where did the black person go poop ? in the toilet!

Rebecca Black's new album.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

Q: what do you call someone on Anti Jokes A: Someone with no friends trying to find a funny joke to make friends.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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