What's worse then burning in hell for eternity? Well, a lot considering hell is a made-up place.

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Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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What do you call a pencil made entirely of steel? I dont know, i dont name my pencils.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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Whats Red and smells like Blue Paint? Red Paint.

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Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

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Knock knock whos there? me oh, cool... well come in.

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Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the girl. Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He has cerebral palsy.

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a guy walks into a bar. unexpectedly, a terrorist walks in and shoots him in the head. After lots of therapy he can now go back to his average life.

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2+2= 478

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

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I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

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what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

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What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a nice man.

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yo momma is so ugly, she is unpleasant to look at!

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Why did the armless girl fell off the swing? Because somebody pushed her. Why did se fell again? Because somebody pushed her again.

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Man 1: What kinds of phones do snails use? Man 2:I don't know, I don't think they do. Snail: The snail said nothing, snails don't speak.

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Womens rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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