What did Jesus get for Christmas? Birthday presents.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

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A girl walks into a bar. She's a lesbian.

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Why was the little Latino boy sad? Because his father sexually molested him earlier in the evening.

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A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

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Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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panda bears are racist to mexicans-they are black, white and asian

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

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What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

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Nice legs....What time do they open?

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MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

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yo momma is so fat her doctor recommended a new healthy diet.

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A guy walks into a bar and thinks of a superlative anti-joke. After having an enjoyable time at the bar he then promptly goes home and posts it for the world to see.

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Why don't blind people own cats? They do, who told you that?

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Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone? A. He got attacked by a dog.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

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why did Suzy drop her ice cream? doesn't matter, why is she out of the kitchen.

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A Christian and a Jew walk into a bar. The bartender says "What'll you two have to drink?" The Christian says "I'll have a beer." and get this, the Jew says................................"I'll have a beer too."

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Why did the baby stop crying? Mommy shook him.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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