Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

Your eye color is very unique.

why didn't the dog run after the ball? he was blind.

What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

In Soviet Russia its very cold

How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

Why do we have a black president? Because the populace voted and thought him to be an overall better candidate than John McCain.

A fairly-priced Apple computer.

wanna hear a joke? womens rights!

Whats the difference between black and white? nothing,because in art they are just shades.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

What happens when you throw a red rock in a green pond? It sinks.

1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

Q: Why'd the chicken cross the road? A: to get to the other side

Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...