What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

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what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

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So - this baby seal walked into a club.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

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What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

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Reduce, reuse, recycle Anti-joke.com

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Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

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What do you call a small weapon used by northern russians? A Gun.

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Why was the mexican dead? Because he overdosed on Methamphetamine.

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What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

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What's better than having an iPad? I don't know, I lost both my hands.

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Man 1: What kinds of phones do snails use? Man 2:I don't know, I don't think they do. Snail: The snail said nothing, snails don't speak.

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Question 1 - What is 1 + 1 = Hospital

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen my mixtape? It's really FIRE.

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How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

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Why was John the octopus depressed? Because his real name was Steve, and he couldn't communicate this to anyone since he lacked the higher brain functions and vocal chords required to do so.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

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What's worse then burning in hell for eternity? Well, a lot considering hell is a made-up place.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Womens rights

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Q:Why did the dog jump over the fence A:Because he could

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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