What's green and has four wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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What's worse then Obama? Nothing

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Womens rights

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Q:Why did the dog jump over the fence A:Because he could

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What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

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Asian NASCAR.

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What's worse then finding out that your partner has AIDS? I don't know actually, but finding out would suck pretty bad...

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What happened to the power lifter that tried to deadlift 920 lbs while wearing nothing but his briefs? he succeeded because he is trained power lifter.

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What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

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A hayride would be fun.

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fsh

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how do you make a janeter cry, you shit on the floor

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What's big, white and will killl you if it falls out of a tree? A polar bear.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

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Q: What do African Americans and Doorknobs have in common? A: Before the Emancipation Proclamation was passed, neither was free. Doorknobs still aren't free.

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Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

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What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

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What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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