A man walks into a bar He says ouch

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(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

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What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

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What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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why did aodhan not play BO2? Aodhan has Cerebral palsy.

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What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

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"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

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A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

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What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

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Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

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these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

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Q. Why do Puerto Ricans throw their trash away in clear plastic bags? A. So Italians can go window shopping.

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whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

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what's blue and white and red all over? -nothing the "red all over" part implies a contradiction to blue and white.

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Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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Dislike this!!!!!!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

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Q: What do a dildo salesman and a car salesman have in common? A: They are both salesman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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