A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

Where do bananas come from? Mexico

why do holocasut jokes make us laugh? i dont know you tell me

what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? Nothing. They are both created in God's image and likeness so get your mind outta the gutter!

What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

A man walked into a bar. "Ouch"

A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

A seal walks into a club...

What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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