What has feathers, and is known to fly? A bird

What's broken to the side of the road and covered in cookie crumbs? A girlscout that got hit by a car.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

why did the boy fall down? he was shot

whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

So a man is shopping on black Friday...

Whats plastic and phonie a phone

Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

black people. that is all...

Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

What do you call a black guy going into mcdonalds A great opportunity to make a raciest joke

What has four legs, is green and furry, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

Why did the alligator travel through time? To get to the other side.

A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

Your mom is so ugly, she buys groceries at the grocery store.

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen to my mixtape? ... It's really good.

Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

Why couldn't the asian drive the car. He was underage and did not have his license yet.

it all started when it all started when i was born because i was the resault of a broken condom and thats why he left. shortly after my mother killed herself. well thats the way the cookie crumbles. its not a joke i just needed to tell someone.

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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