a man walks into a bar. Bartender asks him "Hey buddy, why the long face?" The man says "Because I'm a raging alcoholic and my wife has left me."

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Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

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What's wrong the a man who can't tell where he is, can't tell where he's going, and doesn't know how to use a map? Downs Syndrome

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PATHETIC

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Why don't white people do the right thing? Because we suck

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Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

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Three men walked into a bar. They looked around, saw that it was pretty crowded, and decided they'd feel more comfortable going somewhere a little less busy down the road.

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A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

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So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

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Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

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Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

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when ever i finish a sentence say im a man Me :i met a girl You:im a man Me: i invited her to my place You: im a man Me: we sleept together You:im a man Me:she wisperd in my ear You: im a man

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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What do old people really like? Anal sex.

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Society.

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What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She didn't pass her driving test.

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Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

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Roses are red My binoculars are blue The curtains are open I see you

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I'm hungry.

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Why did the little girl get a new tricycle? To cope with her father's death

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A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops