Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

What did the man in need of a prosthetic arm get from the hospital? A diagnosis for cancer.

It says so on your cap.

Nina and Harry sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes divorce because their marriage didn't turn out right and Harry hit Nina in the head with a iron...

How do you kill an already dead man? You don't he's already dead.

NEVER

why did the man fall over he was a loaf of bread

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

1 + 1 = ? 2 "No" "what have you been smoking?" "Seriously, 1+1= window" "WTF???"

Why did the black man buy watermellon? Because he was having a barbecue in his suburban neighborhood and he wanted some fruit.

I man walks into a bar. He got drunk.

A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

What's worse than 10 dead babies in a dumpster? One dead baby in 10 dumpsters.

whats worse than one week in school? two weeks in school. whats worse than two weeks in school? three weeks in school whats worse than three weeks in school? child abuse, killing animals and murder

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm about to kill you Don't scream, here's a lollipop

Why was Stephanie sad? She dropped a washing machine on her toe

Why did the girl go over her texting limit? She had a hot boyfriend.

The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

What did the nerd say to the bully? Nothing. The bully killed him before he could say anything.

Knock knock. Why do you say the words "knock knock" without actually knocking on the door?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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