What happens when you wake a sleepwalker? Waking sleepwalkers does not harm them. While it is true that a person may be confused or disoriented for a short time after awakening, this does not cause them further harm. In contrast, sleepwalkers may injure themselves if they trip over objects or lose their balance while sleepwalking. Such injuries are common among sleepwalkers.

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What do you call a blonde with one leg? Heather Mills

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Why is Kayne West such a jerk? He has autism.

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What did my dad say when i knocked over the christmas tree? nothing, my father is dead

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What's the connection between Obama and Michael Jackson? They both want to be a girl.

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What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Dead babies can't paint.

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Q: What is green, has red shoes, exists in videogames and runs really really fast while collecting rings, running trough loops, has a fox sidekick etc? A: Sonic The Hedgefrog. Moral: I was always a bigger fan of Super Fratelli Brothers though...

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Roses are red..... violets are blue...... I have a gun get in the van

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What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tragedy.

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What did the woman say when she didn't finish her meal? Can I get a to go box

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My period is red, Your sauce is white, now pull down your pants and let me do my workout.

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Your mother is so fat when she jumps she comes backs down.

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Why did the woman have an abortion? Because she was raped at the age of 17.

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Q: What's the difference between Rush Limbaugh and the Hindenburg? A: One is a huge, flaming, Nazi gasbag, and the other is a drug-addicted talkshow host.

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A man climbs up a tree. Once he reaches the top he is scared and thus incapable of getting down.

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? Dance Dance Revolution

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Okay I have knock knock joke but u have to start it. Okay Knock knock Who's there (akward silence)

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What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation. John was never the same.

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Why can't a T-Rex masturbate? Because dinosaurs have been extinct nearly 65 million years, due to an asteroid collision with the Earth

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What did the man say to the drug dealer? I'd like some drugs

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Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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