roses are red violets are blue im much younger than i look;)

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Why did the dog get arrested? He didn't the people responsible for causing the dog fight got arrested for animal abuse.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Me! Hi

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What did Kermit the frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ash Oh hey Ash, I was expecting you, come on in!!

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whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? i don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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a blond, brunette, and red head all walk out of a hair salon.

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Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

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"Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "The police. We're looking for three escaped inmates posing as bananas."

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what did the lonely boy get for christmas? the absence of a familly

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Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

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What did the jew get for christmas nothing because he doesnt celebrate christmas.

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A fat boy walked into a party

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How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb

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What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

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What is the difference between Barack Obama and Simba from the Lion King? One is a cartoon character from a beloved Disney classic and the other is the current President of the United States of America.

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A: u wanna die B: that is a stupid question because unless u are suicidal u will not, retorical or not A: i do wanna die B: u should get some help u freak person a never did get help, while walking to a certivied psychiatrict evaluater he got hit by a truck. his body can be found at the intersection of church and flatbush, brooklyn. JK he got shot, he was in brookly, duh.

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Yo Dawg, I heard You Like Kittens and Volcanoes... So, I threw Your Kitten In A Volcano.

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A boy walks into a baker, asks for a loaf of bread. The baker enquires "White or brown?" to which the boy replies "It doesn't matter, I've got my bike."

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What do you call double A's? Batteries

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why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms why did no one pick her up? she was an orphan why did she drown? puddle...

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Whats the difference between a ferrari and a boner? Too much to list.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

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Blind people can't read this.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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