What can a pizza do that a Jew can't? Pizzas can't do anything, so the answers are infinite.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Your mama's so stupid, she gave birth to YOU.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you say when you see your tv floating at night? Drop it, nigga!!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A black man walks into a bar. The man behind him ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

So, a Hispanic, Jewish, Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "Aren't you tired of this?"

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's funny about 4 black people going off a cliff in a Cadillac? Nothing. You're adopted

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Obese penguin. It died of a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is a chicken and is not intelligent enough to know that he is about to be hit by a bus while hopelessly searching for food under an elderly man's nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A Guitar is an instrument. As far as you know...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a black man with no legs? Crippled.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What starts with D and ends with ICK? Drumstick.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a blind-deaf-mute.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

An octopus walks into a bar. The people in the bar, realizing the potential of danger, stand up and leave the bar quietly.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the boy with no legs get? A treadmill.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the blonde say when she tripped down the stairs? Nothing she was unconscious and had a serious concussion.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Doorbell salesman.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Knock Knock whose there brian Brian who oh because im chinese you assume my second name is Hu? terribly sorry theres been a misunderstanding, i was asking you surname, i should have been more specific! No it my fault, i dont know why i overreacted my second name is Hu its ok, what can i do for you? is it allright to come in for some noodles? are you paying? only a reasonable price ok then, dont see why not

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops