What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

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If you were an octopus what would you? Say "I an octopus".

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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What's dried up and smells like potatoes? Potato ships and school french fries.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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You know what's wrong with Oprah? Generally nothing. She's a well-respected African American woman who happens to be quite wealthy and likes to share her wealth with other people.

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What did the 5 cent store clerk say to the customer? That will be 5 cents.

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yo mama is so fat, she should seriously consider gastric bypass surgery, morbid obesity is extremely detrimental to one's health

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Small breasts.

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Why did Ian die Because I shot him with a gun

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What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

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a black man walks into a shop for an interview....everyone gets afraid and hides behind there desk..when the black man wonders why they are scarred he says "I'm here for the interview"...they all tell him to leave because on his resume he put his name as john...they thought he was white....

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the light was green

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

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Why did the boy drowned Bc he couldn't swim

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the p is silent!

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What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

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What happens when you throw a penny between two Jewish men? Probably nothing, but one of them might pick it up and ask if you have dropped a penny.

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What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

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What happened to the gay guy? He died of aids...

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Q: How pregnancy test is performed in Somalia?! A: Shove a piece of bread between the legs of the women and if the bread is bitten when you take it out, she is pregnant!

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Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Little boy blew! Little boy blew who? Micheal Jackson....

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Why did the woman say ow? She was shot in the foot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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