Why did the blonde drown in the bathtub? Her father repeatedly molested her and beat her mother, she no longer wanted to live in such a life and promptly committed suicide

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Fine, you got me there, I have already made sure that you get your compensation, it is the least thing I can do you let me know if anyone claiming to be part of my order bothers you again, I promise I will personally enforce strict guidelines in order to ensure that such a thing never happens again. I hope you will trust me, I will no longer call it the Order of Nero, but as you know we cannot reveal the true name of our order. I also agree to meet you in person so we can further discuss this impeding situation which I will give top priority. Truth is Nero, that I used to be one of your co workers in the underground, and my attempts at saving what is left might not be as ideal as the goals we are set to achieve are, we simply cannot expect that people excel at greatness at the first go. Of course this grave incident is not even near a "mere lack of greatness" but rather a group of people that yes, sadly have rightfully claimed to be members of our society, yet I need you to come to terms that this was a huge oversight in my vision for a new and "improved" underground society, and not a intentional attack at you and your personal security. I submit to your demands, and I ask that you partake in a small number of meetings where we can all discuss and further develop the necessary guidelines required to further solidify our foundation.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do u call a boomerang that doesnt come back A stick

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Timmy pass his chemistry exam? Because he studied.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's red and looks like blue paper? Red paper

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the woman go to the kitchen? The same reason she went to the bathroom, she needed to wash her hands because she was finger painting. Her husband was using the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how did the dinosaurs die? they got old

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Knock! Knock! Who's there? Russel. Russell who? Russell Johnson. Oh, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the fisherman go to Alaska? The commercial fishing business is strong there and it was a sound financial decision.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A hippie gets on a bus and greets the bus driver in a nice fashion Once the bus stops at his bus stop he thanks the bus driver and gets off the bus

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did Mel Gibson say to the African-American? I'm sorry

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q) 1+1=? A) 6.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why didn't the boy get his soda Because the cashier shot him

thumb_up thumb_down -1

man:"gullible is written on the celling" boy looks up

thumb_up thumb_down -23

whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 6 cheated on 7 with 9.. 6 is now a victim of domestic violence.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the little boy with cancer get for christmas? Nothing. He was a jew. Jew's don't celebrate christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What would Michael Jackson do on the Moon? Nothing. He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the women order for dessert? Pie.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What was the blind man's favorite game? Marco Polo

thumb_up thumb_down -25

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I like poop in my butt

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops