So a white president,a mexican president, and a black president,are on a plane and its going down. The white president wishes he was a dove, and he flies away to safety. Then the mexican president wishes he was an eagle and he flies away to safety. Then the black president falls out the plane and says o s**t and turns into poop.

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Why didn't the man jump out of his window when his house was on fire? Because he is afraid of heights.

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Caroline Kelly.

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What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad event that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think you're smart But I've got a plan for you.. Leaves are green Stems are too You lied to me Now I will shoot you.. Violets are blue Roses are red You made me angry And now you are dead.

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what will you never loose if you play world of warcraft your verginity

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penis

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What did the foot say to the other foot? Nothing, because they are feet.

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What do you call a Puerto Rican, a Blonde, and an African woman in a taxi cab? Three people who happen to be traveling to the same location at the same point in time.

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Doctor Doctor I think I'm a dog. Sit down on the couch and tell me about it. Ok.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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What do you call a person with a big ass head? A person with a big ass head

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

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What did the white teen say to the black man? Sup nigga. What then followed? A savage beating at which the teen did not survive.

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why couldn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell of a building? She was wearing mittens.

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How did the Muslim blow up? He accidentally left his gas on and after a while sparked up a cigarette.

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Q: Whats Faster than a bullet A: A Jew chasing coin

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"It's a blimp, it's a hot air balloon!" "No wait, it's your mom."

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Why don't I ever lmao? Because my ass got bitten off by a bear.

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Whats worse than an offended chicken walking around with a squirrel stapled to its back? A crusty old man with hepatitis peeing on 10 babies.

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An astronaut walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After waiting for about 1 and a half minutes he receives his beer. The bartender says it was 3 dollars. The astronaut checks his wallet and finds no money so he pays with credit card. The bartender swipes his credit card but the card doesn't work. So the astronaut takes out his debit card. When the bartender swipes the debit card it worked. In relief the astronaut looks at the bartender and says "Thank you" and then goes home.

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What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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Whats worse than getting a parking ticket? The Bubonic Plague

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Why don't you throw rocks at a black person riding a bike..... It could be yours

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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