Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

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why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

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lick my ballsack.... ok

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

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What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

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Q: What do you call a white guy cooking a dinner? A: A chef

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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What's the main reason for divorce? Marriage.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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What happened when a Blonde girl and a Ginger man have sex without a condom? The woman gets pregnant and then after about nine months the woman gives birth and the child grows up, when the child is adolescent it is able to reproduce and the process continues again.

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Q: What's funnier than a dead baby? A: Two dead babies.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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What happens when you cross a Labrador and a Poodle. A species of dog that has been cross bred.

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"Up to 50% off."

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What is worse then 10 babes nailed to a tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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What do millions of men give their girlfriends every Christmas? AIDS.

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Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

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Three blokes walk into a bar. I'm british.

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Why did the girl run across the street? Because she was being chased by a man with a knife

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What is brown and has three legs? A horse. It lost a leg in a glue factory.

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Ring. Ring. Hello? Hey, It's Sean Oh hi! How are you?

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Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

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What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to their son who got an A- in algebra? How do I know? I don't speak Chinese!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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