Roses are red Violets are blue Wrong. Violets should be purple.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: What's different about a boy and a girl? A: Nothing. There used to be a notable difference but nowadays you have to strain in order to tell them apart.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

No, you think faster smarter and harder than everyone I know, you change and adapt faster for each day, sometimes I just think one has to stop asking oneself what makes one happy, and simply choose to be happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q:What do you call a duck that can fly? A:Bird.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Sarah Palin

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

What did the Muslim do on 911? He weeped for the loss of his many good friends and relatives

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did Kristi drop her chap-stick? Kristi was of the many children held in hostage of the Jewish heritage during the times of Hitler's wrath. At the Concentration camps they were not given the opportunity to maintain a healthy, average diet thus decreasing her body strength. No longer could Kristi hold her chap-stick - alas her frail little fingers slowly released the cylinder shaped tube and hopelessly watched it hit the ground. As it hit the ground, a cloud of dust swept over Kristi's body. At the same time Kristi was taking a big whiff of fresh air (just kidding, the air at concentration camps were not fresh - it reeked of acid) she accidentally inhaled the dirt which fled through her body and made her faint. She woke up and it was a dream, lol.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what did Russell wilson get for Christmas a seahawk..

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Knock Knock Who's There? Betty Betty Who Betty Sue Never heard of ya I'm here from the management. You have a present. I don't care, we don't take kindly to you city folks. But Sir, If you don't take this I will have to ask you to leave. Well what is it. It's your bill. Knock knock Who's there? Cowabunga! Cowabunga Who? Moo Moo alalalalalal woohoo i'm so high

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Yo mamas so fat that when a bus hit her she said " who threw that pebble at me"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the black guy do with his gun? Shoot a deer

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

(This is a joke made up by the young son of a friend of mine many years ago. It is still one of my favorite jokes.) Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

It is so hot out here, that it could melt an ice cube that was once in the freezer!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Doctor Doctor, I keep getting horrible boils all over my face! Okay then. Take off your underwear and we'll see what's going on.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down -21

We are unhappy, unfilled because we cannot complete our dream, it is always about us, then again, is wanting the best for others being selfish?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is red,brown and stinks? A deer that's hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are c0ck violets are vag this joke is for george i like it like that<3xxxx

thumb_up thumb_down -5

melon

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down +26

sooo.how do you get a bonner when your in a room with lady gaga???? you tell lady gaga to turn around and you think of brittany spears bending over get it nahhh probably not

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops