Why couldn't the boy hide his penis? Circumcision.

So there was once this cool little dude that had a purple nose. People would walk by on the streets and say, "Hey! That's a cool nose!" Purple nose man appreciated that they didn't pretend it wasn't there, and instead celebrated the diversity. The next day, he was scalped.

Why did the man order a mail order Asian bride? Because he was caucasian which meant females of his race had unrealistically high expectations of a partner due to various materialistic overtones that are constantly portrayed in their medie creating a society of over entitled women who think they are owed the earth.

Why did the Japanese boy drop his sushi? He was hit by a tsunami

Mr Whelk visited his doctor. His doctor put on a sterile glove and inserted two fingers into the man's rectum. "Does this feel all right?" The doctor asked "Yes" replied Mr Whelk. "But is my wrist broken or not?

How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

What's big, white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

What Did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

How do magnets work?

What's small, pale blue and sits at the bottom of the pool? "An over ripe blueberry."

A bar walks into a man and the man walks into a watermelon then the watermelon walks into a black guy then the black guy walks into a piece of fried chicken then the piece of fried chicken walks into a hotdog then the hotdog walks into a wall then the wall walks into a horse then the horse walks into a jar of mayonaise then the jar of mayonaise walks into a can then the can walks into the bar

Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -George. -George Who? -George Carpenter, Remember? We were in the same class in third grade. -Come on in!

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? About 4:30, unless he's running late, stuck in traffic, had to get gas.

Wanna hear a funny story? Sure Ok.

Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

I now pronounce you man and lion. You may now kiss the pride.

Yeah, totally.

Roses are red... Violets are blue... Unless your colour blind.

hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

Why did the boy give the girl flowers? Because her parents died in a car crash and he felt bad.

Why does ISIS want guns? Because they wanted to kill. Duh.

Why was the little boy late to school Cause he walked on a landmine

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...