Today i started to think lucas was homosexuaI.. I am scared

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the boy late for class? He was late because he got stabbed and left in the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why hppened when the little boy failed his math test? He cut off his penis, shaved his head and hung himself

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you ask a blonde out to dinner? Politely

thumb_up thumb_down +14

-What's long, hard and full of semen? -Since this is a play on words both an erect penis and a naval submarine could apply here

thumb_up thumb_down -34

yo mama is so ugly she walked by a mirror and looked at her reflection cuz thats what mirrors do

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why couldn't Scruffy get out from under the car? It had parked on his skull.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

thumb_up thumb_down +63

We could have had it all Rolling in the deep You have my heart inside of your hand As you've just now inexplicably ripped it out of my ribcage.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why does no one like fat people? Because of Jesse Ziegenbein

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Write Your Own Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Enter the following: Which is bigger the moon or the elephant? Your Answer: The elephant [] I have read and agree to the Terms of Service ((((Submit)))) [1 error prohibited this post from being saved] ---There were problems with the following field -> Wrong answer

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats the difference between a turkey and a baby i dont know how to cook a turkey

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live on at the bottom.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's the difference between a train and a lamp? A lot

thumb_up thumb_down +28

One day i woke up, and found my wife dead on the floor. lol.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Who the hell knows..?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the black man have a Lamborghini in his garage? Because he got good grades in school, was accepted into a nice college, and earned a medical degree, which he used to get himself a well-paying job in the medical field.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Your mother is so morbidly obese that if she sat on me, she would crush my skull and kill me.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why do Christian protest against gay marriage? They protest because they believe gay marriage is a sin.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops