What's green and apple-y? You're gay.

Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

a black man has a shotgun. having an IQ of 11 he shot his hands off

josh roberts goes to church to take advantage of religiously confused young boys

Penis

Why did women scream loudly!? As the women was unexpectadly frightend!

Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness ... Hello?

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

Why was the Mexican smart? Because he was very well educated and went to college, and got a Ph.D

What do you call a man with a fork stuck in his head? A man with a fork stuck in his head

What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

A stipper walked into a club, though it was a golf club so she tripped and cracked her skull on it.The end.

Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

What is bloody and has two legs? Half of a cat.

knock knock whose there? banana banana who? knock knock? whose there? banana knock knock? whose there? banana

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What has a mouth but cant talk Helen keller What has eyes but cant see Helen keller What has ears but cant hear You guessed it an ear of corn

You know what they say about a man with big feet! They say it's indicative of the size of his penis, although there's no scientific evidence backing this up.

Why did the kid die last night? because his mum stabbed him multiple times in the chest.

Q: why did the black man kill the white man? A: he was clinically depressed, mentally unstable, and had a grudge against the white man that had nothing to do with his race.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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