Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

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Ammy Winehouse walks into a bar Don't you said we should stop jocking about dead people ?

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You might be a redneck if you hate your father and you live in a trailer

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Walruses are basically saber-toothed seals. That does not affect the fact that they are awesome.

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BTW ANders she is gone, read below, seriously! And your mother is ugly, but she is so kind to me, so ill be nice to her too... Seducing a LONE WIDOW ME 32 years she... 180 and always blushing around me? Thats gonna be hard... No seriously, I kissed her on the cheek the other day, she moaned... And she aint that old... looks like a old 40 year old. ANDERS! AAAANDEERS! CHATTERTON!!! Anyway, tell your mom, that way Ill just need to enter, kill you, and you know... make her feel like she is ... 77 again? Nah she is ahornbag so she must be younger, wont kiss her on those lips though ANDERSSSss because she smokes, the others? Sure, Ill take a pic of her squirting! From the guy that taught you how to make any woman squirt... YOu fucking asshole!

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Wanna know how to confuse a blonde? No. I wanna know which way you would prefer to die.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

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Joe: CHOP CHOP KICK PUNCH HI-YAH! Mike:What are you doing? JOE: PRACTICING CHPO MENTAL KICK KARATE!!!!!!!

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What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms.

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Your mother is so average in weight and in attractiveness.

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wanna know the biggest joke on antijoke.com? People's spelling.

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What do you call a green dog? A green dog.

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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what do u do if a women serves you lunch in the living room? u tighten the chain!!!!!!

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T-Dog scare me

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What happened when the Hispanic man dropped his Wollet? He picked it up

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Why do eggs come in 12? because 13 is bad luck

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Why did the guy in the wheelchair die? He was mauled by tigers.

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What happened when Aladdin rubbed his lamp? It got slightly cleaner.

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What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

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A Woman decides she wants to stop making sanwiches for her sexist boyfriend. She walks away and lives a happy life. In hell.

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What has many legs, but can't walk? A dead spider.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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