How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

What's worse than biting into a worm and finding an apple? Why would you bite into a worm?

Why does the girl get humped by a pig? Because she has sexual needs and no other more attractive animal, including an human wants to hump her.

where did susan go durring the explotion? every where...

Whats brown and sticky? A massive shit.

I have alzheimers and one day me and my nephew were............................

Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

This message is boring. There is no joke. There is no punchline. You can stop reading now.

About numbers, it was 180 mg of valium... And I am going to live becausepeople got there in time, my heart never stopped because luck, the doc was only making a joke about me "having ingested enough valium to die at least twice". Sanders, I just got your girlfriend to agree to a threesome, if my banana ever wakes up again, AND WHEN... Thou areth forgiven, btw I sent him a picture of Line`s unshaved vagina, and a note stating: U recognize this? Find out more on horsehead network! Meh His name is Anders something Chattington, yeah for all that know him, guess whose finger is on her unshaven... Yeah, maybe you should not have messed with a guy that can have ANYONE. Ps: Then its your mother, then your sister which is 17 (and pretty 16 is legal here so fuck you Chatty!) and then I SHALL STRIKE THY WITH THE VENGEANCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! Because you are forgiven, which I cant even remember what means, I mean I know I am typing my experiences here, but thats only because I remember by muscle memory where the buttons are, said the doctor... I can still play Snes emulators... Not, because my numb fingers cant click anything and Line is gone. I TOUCHED HER ALREADY YA KNO! YOU SAW THE PIC, My skin is tan, and... well you know she is here... The best part? She is totally okay with you knowing, sayonara pal, id watch the "fluor" in your mothers pussy the next time you eat it!

If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

haha

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

apple pie.

How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

Q:What's the difference between a lake? A: a tree, because motorcycles dont have doors... :) crf

What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

What's worse than finding an apple in your worm... I mean, a worm in your apple ? "Then I took an arrow to the knee" jokes.

why did the guy round second base? to get to 3rd

A white man walked into a bar, and an indian walked into a totem pole...

Hi

Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

All of these jokes suck. Just saying.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...