Like if you have a vagina. Also like if you have a dong. (Penis)

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A small black boy was walking down the street. He ran into a police officer and the police officer shot him, why? A: Because the officer was racist.

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So, a bulldozer rolls into a bar, there is no bar now.

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What do you call a man in a wheel chair? Stephen Hawking

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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The Female Orgasm

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oh my god! what? i heard this joke the other day and it was hilarious. ok, tell me? actually it doesn't matter i can't remember anyway.

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Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will cause me to develop a drinking problem.

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What did the prisoner say to the man who posted his bail? Thank you.

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Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second muffin and says "OH MY GOD I CAN TALK!" the second muffin is so shaken in its beliefe system by a talking muffin that it commits suicide.

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If you're jumping rope, and both the tires are flat, how much frosting would it take cover the staircase? Rocket!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapos.

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What did one Chinese man say to the other? ?????

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what would you get if you combined a sixth grader with a machine gun? A homophobe

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A fish swims up stream for his natural spawning cycle. The fish was out of shape and died from heart failure.

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How do you survive a tornado? You dont.

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Why couldn't the black baby swim? Babies do not posses the muscular capacity nor technique to enable them to properly swim.

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what did the gay man say to the pole? May i have this dance

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There was a 4-car accident in Mexico today. 87 people died.

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How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

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Say the line below sixteen times very fast: I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... Done? Good boy!

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Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

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2 guys are in a bar joking and having a good time. One guy looks to the other and says, "So...HOWS your wife?" The man replies "...She died in a horrible car accident." The man's friend then says "...I am sorry to hear that.." "Yeah I know I wish that God damn rat wasn't in the road goddamn fucker"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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