What do you do when you find a blonde on her knees? Help her up, because obviously she has fallen.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

knock knock who's there Steve Go away

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Why did the plane crash? Why? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

thumb_up thumb_down -65

What do you call a dog with no legs? What ever you want, its still not going to come.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did Tarzan say to the elephant?... "Hi elephant." A few weeks later, the elephant had grown a mustache and gotten a pair of sunglasses. What did Tarzan say to him then?... Nothing, he didn't recognize him.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the cat say to the dog? Nothing. Cats can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Knock knock. Who's there? Obama. Obama who? Barack Obama, President of the United States. I was wondering if I could borrow a cup of sugar. I'm baking cookies for my family, because they really like my cookies.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your mom's house is so old, that she has rats and other various critters such as spiders, gnats, and mosquitoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What has 4 legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you a pool table

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why do black people eat Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because there is Protein in chicken and without protein their bodies would succumb to such diseases as Kwashiorkor and Cachexia.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you tick off a Doctor? You cut off his right thumb.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than 1,000 babies stapled to 1,000 trees? 1001 babies stapled to 1001 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you make a black guy cry? You kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do bicycles and platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Three gay men are in a bath tub and bubbles come up and one says "who farted?"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown how angry are you?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti-Joke.com Best thing since something better that preceded it.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A black man and a mexican jump from a tree. Who hits the ground first? The mexican. The black man had a rope tied around his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops