A pigeon walks into a bar. Someone left the door opened.

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there once was a man from Afghanistan. Who wanted to bang his brother-istan. they licked and sucked. and kissed then f**ked, he got aids. and never did that-again!

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What's frozen and eaten off a stick? Your dead uncle Norman

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Why did the boy drown? Because he was actually a brick. I lied about him being a boy.

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My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

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Yo Mama is so fat that she should probably make an appointment with a bariatric surgeon.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

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Sarah Palin.

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what are you mike bibby?

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Kill me? Lol, come get me sis, I can kill you wit my mullet, nobody wants to take my phone, but your sister already replied to my "anna fuck" with "arent you married buddy? :)" yeah a smiley, ill show you! The doors are open, if I fail to take you out, I am not deserving of living futher, course yea mother blusx to everywown, I mean she is horny all the tiem! Anywaz, hurry up, im out of stims so im fallin sleeps, told ur sis to send me a nude pic, rite now... so this mite take 3 minuts. Hey, watch the next pic im gonna send you, that should motivate you to fight me sersly, i men sure im slo, but imma sp ful ov valeium dat i feel nor feear no pain... never feeer pain so whateves... Nah your sis is skinny, thats not here, the pixture is fakye, for now... u dyou know dat she keeps snending them hearte and smile and even a smilei with a rose, thats FLIRIIIIIING! Flirting, anyway you get the picture, but I wont respon anymor becuz i am shuttin down this pc and gonna dream abot the things to0 you sis. ;)

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knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

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A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side which would be a incontrovertible (obvious) decision.

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Your mom is so environmentally conscious, she recycles a great deal.

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Q: What did the redneck say with missing front teeth? A: "I can only eat things with my back teeth and I have AIDS."

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Why did the baby cross the street? It was stapled to the chicken

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a morman walks into a bar, he buys a 7up.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Hitler.

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What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

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how do u have sex with a really hot girl who is not interested in you? Rape her in a dark ally

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on a planet, in a galaxy, far far away... you have cancer

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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Why did the man jump out of the plane? Because the plane was losing fuel fast so he grabbed a parachute and went for it and realized that was the only one left so everyone died a horrible death.

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Guess what sucks! A Vaccume. Guess what blows! A Sucky Vaccume.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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