Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Elton John? They're both gay.

Why is my girlfriend pregnant? We wanted an abortion

A dyslexic man walked into a bra

What did the guy say to the mushroom?

when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

Q:What is a black guy running with an iPod in his hand? A: A person who enjoys to listen to music while running.

A black man takes a girl home from a nightclub. She says "Show me it's true what they say about black men". So he reveals a big penis and they have sex there and then.

K.

What happened to the adventurer ? He took an arrow to the knee and became a guard.

What happened to the teacher? He taught his students.

Joe:Hi Steve how was your day? Steve:Fine why do you ask? Joe:Because I am gay. Steve:Well if you are so happy tell your sister.

a duck walks into a bar. he sits by another duck and says duck 1: Quack!! duck 2: I was just about to say that! duck 1: No way! duck 2: Seriously! duck 1: We are so a-like. duck 2: totally!

How do you get 10 babies out of a blender? Potato Chips! Stupid!!!!

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

CHORGLUND

a mexican, an asian and a black are all in a car, who's the driver? their friend bill who offered to take them to the upcoming three days grace concert.

What's the difference between people with aids and people with cancer? People with cancer can get into heaven

Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

why did the boy drop her ice cream? -he got hit by a bus

How much does a polar bear weigh? About 1,150 pounds.

How many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 50 in the ashtray.

A fat man on a moped

What's green and has wheels? Grass i was lying about the wheels.

What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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