Where did the little girl go when the bomb went off? Everywhere

Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

Knock Knock Come in.

A woman is on an escalator, which stops, then she cries. Why? The escalator is in a hospital and stops because the power has failed. She was going to visit her husband who is on life support, which has now but out.

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

AWWWWWW YEEESSSS!!!

If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

your mother is so lesbian

why was the boy crying he had cancer

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

What's funnier than a rock. A funny rock.

one day 2 strawberrys walked to the ice cream store and ordered a small cup of banana ice cream they were realley happy they were later taken in and tortured and raped

A politician from the National Country Party keeps interjecting - "I'm a country member, i'm a country member' "yes we remember" says Gough whitlam

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say mustache? ...No. I wish you had said mustache.

what do you get from sleeping with a hooker? An orgasm

How many pianos does it take to change a lightbulb? Two. One to change the lightbulb, and one to play a motivational tune.

You are gay, homo, stupid and a dick

A black goes to college

A homeless man gets a computer. Later that day he is found dead inside the computer.

What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

Why dont dinosaurs speak english? Because a meteor hit the earth and ran them into extinction

How to pick up chicks Pick up a chicken but must be a baby

Who's Micheal Jackson?

Knock knock Who's there? A robber Oh

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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