Whu did the boy drop his cheeseburger? Because the school janitor whacked him with a mallet.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did Moses part the sea Because it was divisible by 2

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Thats a real shame. How come your eyes are red to begin with? You can use hypnosis to change the color, but if you never learned how, I am not gonna teach you.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is the difference between a snail and whale? A loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What will ur wife say when she finds you in bed with a hore-s.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo mama so fat, when she went to a party, they took the apple from the roast pig's mouth, and they put it on her mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats worse than purple nurples? Having the period

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costum

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock? Whos there? Not Sally...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q-Jetski A-How is olive oil made?

thumb_up thumb_down

bum sex lol

thumb_up thumb_down -7

hey do you eat out a woman properly? you cook her first and then eat her. -jeffery dahmers

thumb_up thumb_down

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, Ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

is the glass of milk half empty or half full it is scientifically proven that these are the same thing. Choosing one over the other is like saying that 1/2 does not equal 1-1/2. A normal person would just see this as an ordinary glass of milk.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q. What did the mockingbird say to the blue jay? A. I mock you by mocking you

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: whats worse than being in the car for 1hour A: being in the car for 2 hours Made by: grant chapman:)

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Roses are red, Violets are violet,

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What dud the baseball player do when he struck out? Walked back to the bench

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Death is inevitable.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops