why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

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what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

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Can everyone please stop posting shit about my girlfriend because it seriously isnt cool.

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Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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whats 7+4? 74

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When life gives you lemons, chuck them at someone's face!

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What was the baker a coward? He didn't have the "Bunz" to prove it!

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69

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW

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Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had brain cancer.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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Q: What do you do when the light burns out A: Just replace it with a bulb from a less used room

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why does gamma not smile because he has strokes

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A black man walks into a bar. His parents were immigrants from South Africa.

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Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.

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A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

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i am a dino. RAWR.

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Man#1: Who's John? Man#2: John is John. Who else do you want him to be? Why do you ask stupid questions? Are you naturally this dumb? Do you like the questions I ask? Man#1: (Turns away as he is deeply offended by the man who rudely answered his question.)

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yo mama is so fat she is 1 candy bar away from dieing

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whats worse that being raped by a giant squirrel? being raped by two giant squirrels.

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Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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What bad thing could happen if you gave a black man a gun? ....stop expecting some racist punchline!

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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