Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange Who? Oranges are very good for you and enriched with vitamin C that is apparently good to intake when you are experiencing cold/flu like symptoms during the winter season and your doctor won't give you medication because you aren't sick enough and you already ask for medication to much because you think you are always sick with something. That's what happens when you're a hypochondriac.

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Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvatore Dali mistook them for clocks.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Oh, they were just nailing a notice of foreclosure to the door.

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What do you call something with no legs? A Cripple.

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a mushroom walks in to a little boys party the boy says why are u here mushroom says because im a fun-guy (fungis,fungi)

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knock, knock Sho'sthere? Sam who? Sam Butt

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What’s worse than taking a bite out of your apple and finding a worm? Taking a bite out of your apple and finding half a worm.

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What did Batman tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

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How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personality disorder And so do we

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Whats worse then failing ur English test? Getting hit by a train

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I milked the cow, but no gas came out.

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What did the dog say to the house? Roof

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Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

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Skrillex.

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What did the man say after falling off a bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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A handicapp walks into a bar

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how do u kill a black kid ..... stabb him in the face with a nife

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What did the Chicken say to the Interviewer Interviewer: how do you feel about your eggs chicken: the eggs are actually my periods. Interviewer: how do you feel about your periods ChicKen: you eat my periods everyday. people make cakes, omlettes and all these food out of my period. Imagine the world running on your period. Interviewer: what are your feelings on your periods Chicken: I have a mixture of feelings. i feel really scared because the farmers would kill me if i can have my periods. i feel glorified because the world runs on my eggs and i feel proud. I feel freaked out because the world actualy runs on my periods

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Three gay men are in a bath tub and bubbles come up and one says "who farted?"

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how hungry am i? well im as hungry a starving kid in africa!!!!

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Why do thieves shower before undertaking a robbery? Probably part of their morning routine.

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What do you call a ostrich with no legs? Damn, that's funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops