what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

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A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

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what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

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I used to be an adventurer like you. Then i took an arrow to the knee.

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

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why was the man a redneck? because he got sunburned at the nascar race.

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? a bench is a structure designed for sitting and a Mexican is a person born in Mexico.

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a man walks into a bar and quickly notices a young lady having a drink. He sits beside her and asks 'why the long face?' 'My mother was raped by a horse.'

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Why do the lesbians where pants? Because they are extremely comfourtable and the best for cold days

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Anal cheese curds.

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Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man running the stand "Quack"! because he's a duck... and that's what ducks do.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a drink. Then goes back home.

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How do you confuse a Mexican? Stand in the middle of a crosswalk while shouting "Cthulu will rise!" whilst looking at the sky and playing "Everybody Have Fun Tonight" by Wang Chung. Works every time.

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A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was persecuted for his faith.

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a wall? Ripping them off.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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knock knock whos there banana banana who knock knock whos there orange orange who orange you glad I didn't say banana

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Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

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How do you get your girlfriend to become more enthusiastic about swallowing? Stick your dick in Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia ice cream.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your parents are dead, and so will you.

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A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doc, I blacked out last night and have a sore ass." The doctor took some x-rays and informed him he had colon cancer.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had just been to their father's funeral, who was a Welshman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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