Why did they monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey. By darragh hamilton

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http://Youtube.com/User/PeGamer22

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Knock, Knock. I have no door.

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A man walks into a store and says "Roses are red, Violets are blue, there is a bomb strapped to my chest, give me all the money"

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Roses are red hulk is green, I'd smash that ass, If you know what I mean !

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What did the man say to the horse in the bar? Nothing, communication requires listening and comprehension which horses cannot process in their brains. If anything the man said it at the horse, not to him.

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sooo.how do you get a bonner when your in a room with lady gaga???? you tell lady gaga to turn around and you think of brittany spears bending over get it nahhh probably not

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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As for regarding the Win/Win/Win/sore ass kid comment below... Why not? There is too much Win in order to worry about some fucking soreass thats just gonna grow up to be a slut... RIGHT? Your friendly r*pist Neighborhood r*pist Moral: Man: "He or she who knows I am right, will be be the only one left" Btw, I am the Anti-God, what else can I be? You are the ones that killed Christ Ahahahahahaha! Political humor bonus because my satisfaction of owning you all and your entire screen. Are you Right Winged? Or wrong Winged?

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Q: What did the twin tower say to the other twin tower? A: I'm falling for you.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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What did the unappreciated YTPer say in the comment section of Nyan Cat? "PLEASE CHECK OUT MY YTP'S! I'M BEGGING YOU! YOU DON'T LOVE ME!!! WHY?!!! Q_Q"

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A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

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That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

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what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

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A Muslim walked out of a bomb shop.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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Knock Knock Who's There Gary Oh hi Gary, come in

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

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Women's Rights.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your ugly

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Life is an abstract object incapable of handing out gifts, thus if given a lemon by life you should go to a doctor to make sure you don't have an undiagnosed disease.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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