What did Michael Jackson think when someone threw a tomato off his head? The same as he was thinking before it happened, because everything that goes through Michael Jackson's head is pornographic images.

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68 :)

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

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There's a pair of siamese twins.....One of them's gay.

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This is Jeff and I gots to take a HUGE SHIT. I bet its gonna be smelly and runny. After I wipe I'm gonna lick it and taste it. I bet it tastes GOOD. I hope it has a lil blood in it too.

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Where did the little girl go when the bomb went off? Everywhere

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what's brown and sticky? A stick!

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How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch-n-sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple...

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how do you make a dog roll over you kill it

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A man and woman was sitting at a bar. The man bought the woman a roofied drink and she has never been seen again.

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What is better than winning the gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

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What did the boy do when he was bored and broke? He took to the streets selling illicit drugs such as cocaine. Although dangerous, the rush from said danger solved his boredom problem. On top of this, there is a huge market for such substances and he was not broke for much longer.

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A man from China is learning English and when confronted by a cop accidentally answers each question with one of the few words he knows, impugning himself in the process. The cop, not being a sociopath, realizes that the chuckling foreigner probably has no idea what he has just done and hands him a dictionary to help him cope with the drastic change.

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Hashtag

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I was going to tell my mom an anti-joke. Then she died.

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Why? Because!

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Video Games

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What do video games and school have in common? Nothing, nobody likes school

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Knock knock. Death.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar...

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How did the boy fly? he had wings.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had just been to their father's funeral, who was a Welshman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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