I love you You love me Barney gave me HIVS It started with a hug and ended on the floor IVE BEEN RAPED BY A DINOSAUR!

how do you kill a jew? inject him/her with gratuitous amounts of cyanide until they cease to have brain function and a pulse.

Im Jackson Sinclair and Me and Carter Weeks-69;)

so one day i was getting my daughter artemisia ready for school and so i came in her room and got her pants and so i put it on and then i said did you grow during the summer really did you and then she said daddy both of my feet are stuck on one side of the leg

What did the Black guy say to the White Rapper? I really like your music.

A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

What is better than winning a medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded

Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

Why do mexicans have so many children??? Because condoms resemble skinny balloons.

This is a haiku I said this is a haiku You read a haiku

If you replace all the letters in your name with G A Y it spells Gay... your gay

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your boobss.

why did the chicken cross the road? There was a depletion of its natrual habitat due to deforistation and it was searching for a new home.

What's black and tasteless? either herpes or a redheads soul

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the voices told him to...

asparagus

What did the girl with no hands get? Gloves.

What do get when you cross a lion and tiger? A liger. This hybrid mammal, only observed in captivity, is the largest of all known felines and is thought to be sterile.

Cows make a world go round and round They also live in the town town town They make a funny sound sound sound MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO Where do cows go on saturdays? The MOOvies I am Cow Hear me MOO I weigh 10 times more than you! Why are cows black and white? Cause they dont want to be racist

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped

What do Bear Grylls drink under breakfast? Tea.

I saw a shovel once.

Why couldn't the blonde fix the lightbulb? It was shattered.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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