Why do seagulls fly over seas? Because if they flew over bays they'd be called bagels.

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Yo mama so fat, she farts dust

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Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

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an englishman an irishman and a scotsman walked into a bar there was no welshman. they didn't phone him due to his uncontrollable thirst for violence

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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If there's a clown in a blender, how do you get him out? Tostitos.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana, Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and asked Jill if she wanna. Jill said yes, pulled up her dress, and had a little fun. But stupid Jill forgot the pill, and now they have a son

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What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

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100% of smokers die 100% of people die I am tied to a tree

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hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

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Two Haitians walk into a bar and it collapses

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I doubt it thought much about this. The chicken is a simple animal, and i doubt its actions were spurred by any particular motivation.

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Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

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what do black men and vending machines have in common? neithier work and they both steal your money

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A small boy called peter got stuck up a tree, a man walks past and said "how did you get up there?" peter replies "i fell"

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Your mom is so fat, that it causes great concern for her family.

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Can you get me a stapler,make sure it has staples because if it doesn't..........I won't be a ble to staple anything

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what did the smoker say to the doctor? nothing she died of lung cancer.

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Your mom is SO ugly, I entered her in an ugly contest, and she came in fourth place!

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Knock Knock Come in

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sally stole a t.v what happend next? she was arested

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whats better then 10 babies nailed to 1 tree... 1 baby nailed to 10 trees!

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What do you call an 8 foot anxious priest painted purple named harold? Harold.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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