What happens when you drop the soap in Prison? You pick it back up and go about your business.

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This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike when you eat them they die

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Q. What did the wierd kid get for christmas A. A Pokemon diamond edition

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Cavan keely's the type of guy who drives past hilltown screaming GET IT THE VAN!!

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How much cocain did Charlie sheen do? Enough to kill 2 and a half men

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what did the terorist do when he went out side blew up

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Why did the black guy get kicked out of school? Because he was poor academically.

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How do you prevent aids? Nail an orphan to your genitals before sex.

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what did the ugly girl get on valentines? A paper bag

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How many testicles did Adolph Hitler have? Two.

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What is worse but similar to Jenga? The September 11th attacks.

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666 im christian

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A black baby dies and goes to Heaven. When god put wings on him the baby sais, "Ahh gee god am I an angel?" Then god sais, "Nahh nigga you a bat."

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how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his head.

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Has anyone told you, you look fat today?" "Because you don't.

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Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she had leprosy and had to have her legs and arms amputated

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Q: Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: She had no arms... Q: Knock Knock! Q: Who's there? A: NOT SARA! --- Q: Okay... What song does Sara sing to her arms? A: Somebody That I Used To Know... --- Now. If you're happy and you know it clap your... nevermind O_O

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Q: What is that white stuff in chicken shit? A: Thats chicken shit too

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What do you call a gay lion tamer. It depends on their name.

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Why did the woman have sex with the man? Because she is over 18, which is above all of the legal consent ages in the United States.

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What is grey and looks like a rock? A rock

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Why did the boy laugh? Mr Tickle was his babysitter

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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