What is a man with no arms and no legs on a pile of leaves? A quadriplegic who enjoys the fall.

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what ya call e dong withb eyes peeneyes

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what do you call a kid without arms and legs? names

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Pour it.

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horrible joke I I I I I I I VVV

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Why wouldn't the man in a wheelchair see out the window? The curtains were closed

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Your mama is so ugly that she tried out for America's Next Top Model and did not get in.

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What's the diffrents beetween a carrot and a dead baby? One I like to eat in my soup, the other one s a carrot.

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how much is a microwave full of dead babies? a fridge full of dead puppies.

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A guy walks into a bar. The universe instantly shatters around him under the weight of infinite potential punchlines. He tumbles through the void amongst the shards of his broken reality. This is the worst joke ever.

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Q: What do you call a hobo asking for change? A: Get off my driveway!

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What did pikachu say when his trainer was murdered? Pikachu.

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "I should've voted Democrat!"

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman and a chest of drawers. The Englishman put a flask of coffee in the top drawer without even looking. Diane hates wrestling.

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An owl turns to the other owl. He has to, he can't move his eyes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Thats where the slaughterhouse is.

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What do you call a black man riding a bike? Alan. He's studying environmental engineering at NYU.

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SCHNARRRRRR!!!!!

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knock knock whos there? the police, your under arrest

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I see London, I see France, I am in an airplane on my way to Europe.

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Q.What happens when you win a trophy? A. You don't, there is always someone better than you.

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Why is it hot outside? Because God made it so.

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why did the kid get chemotherapy? because he had cancer

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Steve,Jerry and tom all go into the mens toilets, because they are men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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