how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

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A blond and a redhead are walking down the street the red head says look a dead bird the blond looks up

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Are you a human?

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Knock knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? The MAILMAN The MAILMAN who? I'm the Fu*king mailman now here's your MAIL!

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Vagina ass.

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If I had a gun with only 2 bullets, and was in a room with Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and you; i would shot Hitler and Osama because they committed terrible crimes

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Sharks have teeth, I have teeth, Therefore i am a cat.

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watashi no namae wa ramune desu

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What do you say the big head boy? Brush yo teeth

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Yo daddy!

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What do you get when you cross a tho with a mas THOMAS!!!!!

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motley crew

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What do you call a cow that went through a earth quake? A dead cow.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, i was dropped on my head as a baby, 978e456293&*(^$%ZYI467z57967454^&4543^%$54#%^*44jffdGHFYI

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What happened to Emma? I raped her!

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What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

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Why was the black man running away from the cops? He was running a relay race.

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What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory? Quality control or some other function.

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My name is never spelt right so its all good

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Three blondes walk into a bar. I prematurely ejaculate.

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How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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What should you do when your refrigerator is running? Tell it to FREEZE!

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what language does the turtle speak? i dont know I'm not a turtle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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