Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a fish.

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An eyeball walks into a bar and the bartender asks him what he would like. The bartender promptly wakes up in jail because he was caught having a meth lab in his basement.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots. They all miss.

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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That guy is so lame, he needs a wheelchair to go places.

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What happens when you play a country song backwards? Gibberish.

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Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

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whats yellow sticky and smelly? I dont know i was asking you

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do you want to hear a joke 123456789 987654321 boo!

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Q: Whats better than getting raped by a dog? A: Getting raped by a cat.

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What's the difference between George Washington and Wiz Khalifa? George Washington died many years ago.

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the

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Why did the Mexicans climb the fence? They were tossing frisbee and accidentally threw it into their neighbors yard.

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A stop sign walks into a bar. Looks like somebody invented walking stop signs.

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How do you confuse a black man? Paint him white.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Being a demigod and slaying monsters isn't normal, but on myth it is. MYTH: Not even once.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she stepped on a scale, she saw her ex-boyfrien's phone number!

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How did the man with no arm and no legs get to the store? Well he certainly didn't walk.

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Why don't blind men skydive? Because it would be unwise for a man who can't see to be jumping out of planes, completely unaware of his surroundings.

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Why did the baby die? I killed it.

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A pedophile walks into a daycare

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verry nice how mUCH?

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What did the cop say to the people watching the house fire? All right nothing to see here jokes over

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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