only downer about having sex in the dark is........................ when u look out window and guy u thought u were sleeping with waving and laugh

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Why can't Sean slam dunk cos he has no arms -•#21

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What do you get when you cross a cantaloupe and a dog? "Melon-choly"

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What's a zombie's favourite dessert? I don't know, but I'll give you 50 bucks to go and ask one.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Rob Rob! I haven't seen you in ages come on in.

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Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

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(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

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What time is it? I believe it's half past 10, sir. Damn, I'm late for a meeting. May I ask, what time are you supposed to be there? 11 O'clock Why sir you have half an hour left. No shiitt, sherlock

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Here is a joke for you: minecraft -blarg

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Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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Why was the man with cancer bald? He wanted to tan his scalp.

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There was this women at a banana festival, but she didn't like bananas. So she split

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How does a plumber cross the street? Using his legs

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whats stupid and gay all of my friends

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weiner? balls

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A Japanese man walks into a bar, it collapses and then is demolished by a tsunami.

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a man asked another man what time its it. The man responded by telling him the time and asking why he wanted to know. "thats none of your business" he replied. Why did he say it was none of his business? A- because it was none of his business.

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why did the pirate not get in to the pirate movie it was rated arrrrrr

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Q: why do shower heads have 11 holes? A: Jews only have 10 fingers

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A black person and a hispanic person are in a car, who is driving? The black person, after all it's his car.

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how do you kill a jew? inject him/her with gratuitous amounts of cyanide until they cease to have brain function and a pulse.

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How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except it didn't work for the boy with ice cream.

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I have adhd theref- hey look a dandelion

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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