yo mama is so fat she is 1 candy bar away from dieing

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A kangaroo walks into a bar, it is a fairly common occurrence in Australia and normal process is carried out of evacuating the premises and calling animal control to deal with the situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walks into a bar, and orders a drink. He reaches into his back pocket, but cannot find his wallet. The man was pick pocketed by a skilled thief on his walk to the bar. The man quickly makes calls to cancel his credit cards and minimize the financial loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Girls

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A blonde walked into a phone pole.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the cat have hair? Because he did.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q:How did the blonde commit suicide? A: She didn't, she sought help and was able to live a very happy life with a beautiful family in a nice suburb outside of Cincinnati.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

School : Todays lesson, 1 + 1 = 2 Exam, find the radius of the sun

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is the biggest lie in the universe? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the Black Man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock, Who's there? To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the tomato blush? Because it began to ripen.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the leper go back into the shower? he missed a spot.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a man who leaves his wife and kids to be with another woman? A dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What was everyone doing in the library? Reading

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a prison inmate with no arms or legs? John. That's his name.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the baby cross the road? It was being dragged by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down -9

hello

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If she's old enough for jail, than shes old enough to rail.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

:/ Meh, I am just a side character anyways... Dont really care...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Poop

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops