Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

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A man runs into a bar. He is instantly knocked out.

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Why can't the dinosaur eat M&M's? He is dead. He used to rule the Earth 65 Million years ago, though. Dinosaurs are reptiles. Whales are not. Meow?

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Q: how do you get a girl with one arm to fall out a tree? Wave and wait for her to wave back.

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What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to there son who got an A- in math? How would I know? I can't speak Chinese.

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The 13th Amendment...

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A proton and a neutron talk to each other. Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Simple poke her face.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is impossible to tell because we cannot communicate with chickens, but we can assume there was something of interest over there.

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Q. What's worse than 400 babies going down the road at 80 miles per hours in a garbage truck? A. The same babies being dumped into a trash compactor

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24

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whats worse than not getting what you want for christmas? a child melester

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What do you get if you cross James Bond with Osama bin Laden? James bin Laden.

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Why was the baby crying? Because a tree fell on its legs.

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women's rights.

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DOWN

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Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

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Kerry Katona becomes independent.

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what do you say when you see a winner weaner

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What did the person say to the person about to run into the tree? Watch out for that tree!

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Why did the frog fall out the tree it was dead. Why did the second frog fall out the tree it was stapled to the first frog. Why did the third frog fall from to the tree peer pressure. Why did the fourth frog fall from the tree the third frog was his son. Why did the fifth frog fall from the tree he thought it was a game. Why did the sixth frog fall from the tree he shared the same body with the fifth frog

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1+1 =? Too

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Person 1: What did the woman say when - Person 2: I know! It doesnt matter, shes a woman

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What did the doctor say to the Jew? You have cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops