What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

a blind guy walks past a fish market and exlaims.. "it smells like a fish market"

thumb_up thumb_down +24

what did one mental hospital worker say to the other? Billy your not a mental hospital worker, give heather back her clothes so I can escort you back to your cell.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I beat my family.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

An eyeball walks into a bar and the bartender asks him what he would like. The bartender promptly wakes up in jail because he was caught having a meth lab in his basement.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is the difference between black people and HIV? They are of a specific ethnicity whom which share specific ideals and background; whilst the other is a virus contracted from sexual intercourse.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do you confuse a black man? Paint him white.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Every 20 seconds, a child in africa starves to death... Every 30 seconds, an obese american teen stuffs their face with McDonalds

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's white and likes to likes to take frequent jogs? Stephen Hawkings, I meant so say remain motionless

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

I had a grammar lesson yesterday. I learned how to speak more good.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's the difference between a teacher and a train?!? The teacher is a highly-intelligent organism and the train is a large vehicle used in transporting goods over long distances on the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A man is eating a sandwich. He is promptly shot in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Wanna hear a joke? JORDAN SANDERS IN A RELATIONSHIP.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Poop

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: What do you give a woman with everything? Nothing. You own nothing to give.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Hitler: Ve shud vork togeza and place stategic bombs overr your island. Castro: You are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What can a bench do, that a south African man cant? Support a family. (I HOPE THAT WASN'T RACIST)

thumb_up thumb_down +18

One time i ate a hamberger than an hour later i sneezed but i dont think it had anything to do with the hamberger.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Where is Madeline McCann? 6 Feet under....

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a knife Take off your clothes

thumb_up thumb_down +18

have you ever tasted ethiopian food? ..... neither have they

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops