Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she has no arms Why can't she get back up? Because she has no legs Why won't anyone help her up? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

A seal walks into a club and gets hammered.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

There was once a joke without a proper ending and so

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Knock Knock? Who's there? Dr. Fishbourne Dr. Fishbourne? Yea, I've come to inform you that your son has committed suicide due to lack of parental care and love.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Q: How do you learn the best break dance moves? A: I don't know. You figure it out.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a black priest? Religious.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why was Bootylatrice tardy for school? -She overslept.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call a guy being followed by about 30 others with high powered rifles? A military general serving for his country.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A: Knock Knock! B: Come in!

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Its socially acceptable to sit on a bench.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's big, yellow and green? The sun, i was kidding about the green

thumb_up thumb_down +29

roses are green violets are red im shooting heroine into my head

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why is Ian a virgin? Because he watches cartoon porn

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the mexican jump when he heard police sirens? The sirens where very lound and abrupt. Therefore startling this mexican man.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why didn't the boy buy his mom a gift for Christmas? He was killed by a drunk driver two years ago

thumb_up thumb_down +27

An asian loses to you in starcraft..

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the girl ask her brother for aids? Because her room was a mess

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops