what do outgoing girls get on spring break? raped.

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Republicans

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Yeah its just my way of saying that I appreciate you worrying so much about me, you are a sweet girl, Honestly I do not understand why the hell you guys are using Horsehead AntiJoke out of all places, there are far more terrible forgettable sites available, I mean this sites connection suddenly went from disgustingly terrible to fine and dandy, the Feds, the Interpol and even fucking Al Qaeda might be reading every single message, but there is no way in hell anyone can decipher the code format, if they could, they would have done it when I invented it sixteen years ago, Myself mind you, nothing subtle about me today apparently.

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There was a white man who sat on a log. then suddenly a Chinese man popped out and said he had to leave. he left.

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What did Hellen Keller call her dog? Kamikaze-go, because he was an Akita from Japan and that was his name.

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Old McDonald had a farm But due to the lack of government subsidies, he was unable to make his mortgage payments, causing the bank to foreclose on his property.

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I little 3 year old girl said to her dog "You're my best friend in the whole world" AND THEN THE DOG DIED!

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What does the funeral director say at a jewish funeral? Ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes...

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Where did the Welsh man work? At an office complex.

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Why was Johnny crying? Because... Because... Because... Because... Because... Because of the wonderful things he does.

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why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

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What did the Ethiopian get for christmas? Hepatitis B.

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Ham sandwich

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What is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

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What do you call a black man with a hoe? A farmer.

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What's worse than finding twelve dead babies nailed to a tree? One living baby nailed to twelve trees.

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What do you get when you cross a tho with a mas THOMAS!!!!!

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No it isn't.

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Both my milk chocolate and my white chocolate are brown. Why? I crapped on my white chocolate.

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Why did the man get thrown out of the cinema? The man began to masturbate. He was also blind.

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why did the dog jump into the pool? because the cat was chasing him

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

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Whats black and smells like white paint? A) Black paint!

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what language does the turtle speak? i dont know I'm not a turtle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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