Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who took a shit in my garden?

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this is a joke

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If a blonde and a brunette fell off a building, who would hit the ground first? Answer: Newton's Law dictates that they would hit the ground at the same time.

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69. Yeah- that's my street address.

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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What do you call a guy who hangs around with musicians? A groupie.

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Why was 6 afriad of 7? Because 7 is a rapist.

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What's Funnier than this joke? Lee Evans

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Roses are red, Violets are violet. You guys really suck at making poems...

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What do a ginger kid get for christmas ? it dusen't matter... gingers don't have souls.

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Man is hit by a falling tree his friend immediately responds "Got Wood" the man is now paraplegic

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What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to there son who got an A- in math? How would I know? I can't speak Chinese.

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what do black men and vending machines have in common? neithier work and they both steal your money

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frost bite.

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verry nice how mUCH?

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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Knock, Knock Who's there? A robber who will most likely kill you along with anyone else who will ruin their chances of becoming more wealthy off your most prized possessions.

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What did the black man say to the Mexican? What a fine day it is!

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What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? heart worms

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Three people are stranded on an island. They are captured by a tribe of cannibal natives. The natives say " find 10 fruits of the same kind and bring them back" The first guy comes back with apples The natives say " shove them up your buttox without showing any sign of emotion" The firs guy gets to the second apple and then woos in pain the natives kill him The second guy comes back with blue berries he gets to the ninth berry and laughs. The natives kill him. The two guys are in heaven. The fist guy says " you could've survived why did you laugh?" the second guy replies," I saw the third guy coming back with pineapples"

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knock knock.. who's there? ted? ted, who? STOP f***ing around, you got cancer!

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What did the stuffed animal say to the human after the human said hi? Nothing, after all stuffed animals can't talk

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what is sad about gingers ? they are an unrecognised visible minority.

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How did the man with no arm and no legs get to the store? Well he certainly didn't walk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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