You're in a room with your friend, and you see some one being eaten by a monster. Who's getting eaten? No one, monsters aren't real.

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Why are oranges blue? Wait there orange... right

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? To get home.

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do you know what i see in the perfect girl? my dick.

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What did the three bears say when rhey discovered goldilocks? Nothing. They mauled her to death.

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whats better then 10 babies nailed to 1 tree... 1 baby nailed to 10 trees!

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3 dogs, a blue dog, a yellow dog, and a red dog. The owner was a man named Jeff. Now the blue dog was always sad so Jeff named him blue. The yellow dog was always scared so Jeff named him yellow. Now the red dog he was red because he had red fur, so Jeff named him red. One day when Jeff was reading his newspaper, he accidentally hit his coffee and it fell on the floor. Question: What did Jeff do? I don't know.

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If a blonde and a brunette fell off a building, who would hit the ground first? Answer: Newton's Law dictates that they would hit the ground at the same time.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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What did the goat say to the other goat? They are poorly evolved animals and incable of speaking.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? The video game he really wanted.

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why did the baby die because it was diagnosed with lukimia

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A muslim bought tickets for a 3pm flight. It was 11am, so in the mean time, he went to a bar to loosen up. His bomb vest accidently went off early, killing everyone in the bar. The flight arrived on-time in San Fransico.

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What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to there son who got an A- in math? How would I know? I can't speak Chinese.

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your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

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Haikus are awesome but sometimes they don't make sense hippopotamus

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Where did the little girl go when the bomb went off? Everywhere

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What's Funnier than this joke? Lee Evans

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what's yellow, dirty, and looks like a potato? a potato

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Hey i just F****d you, And this is crazy, Delete my number, And keep the baby!

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How do you keep a puppy warm? You throw it in the fire...

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There was a man from the hood, His limericks weren't very good, So he decided to become a purveyor of monogrammed handkerchiefs and other fine linen products.

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What Do You Call A Swimming Banana.. Nothing Bananas Are Inanimate Objects Therefore It Would Be Impossible For It Swim

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Why did the black man fail math? He had missed many classes due to his mother's terminal cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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