Knock Knock. Whos there? Death

What happended to the family in the hurricane? They died stupid

So horse walk into a bar. The barkeep says "Look horse. You cant be in Here. You're too big and you're going to hurt someone....Its just not gonna work out."

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The horse, being unable to understand the barman, breaks a table and shits on the floor.

Yo mama's so fat that when she stepped on a scale, she saw her ex-boyfrien's phone number!

yfygcugyuyc

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw a fridge at it

The world's smartest man walks into a bar. And he orders the best most reasonably priced drink.

What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

A black man didn't walk into a bar

( o Y o )

Q: What's long and brown? A: The unemployment line.

There once was a squirrel. He lost his nuts.

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

Q: How do you make a plumber cry? A: Kill his family.

Oh. So his name's Brandon.

What's cooler than being cool? Being really cool

What is the funny thing about suicide? nothing...

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 1027

What's the same between a plane a bird and a piece of celery? They all fly except the celery

What do a ginger kid get for christmas ? it dusen't matter... gingers don't have souls.

"Hell nahhh I called shotgun" -Rosa Parks

A Chinese man walked into a bar. He now has a minor concussion.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...