Q. How do Italian girls shave their legs? A. They lie down outside and have someone mow them.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

knock knock whose there? my penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

a kangaroo walks in to a bar and sits down. Kangaroo's live in Auustralia

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you do when a blond ask you a question? Answer politely and thank her for her wonderful question.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Do Minnesotans have accents? Oh ya, you betchya.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's white and sticky? A sticky polar bear.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

how big is a midgets dick? i dont know but probably bigger then mine

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Woman: If you were my husband, I've give you poisoned wine. Winston Churchill: Madame, if you were my wife, I would hope we could have enough love to attempt marriage counseling so as to work out these issues.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

if a cat is mean and a dogs a bitch then what do u call your wife? A MEAN ASS BITCH

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A bad decision because soccer is in their blood

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had just been brutally raped by a lawnmower. The lawnmower had been hit by a car. The woman driving the car was suffering from Alzheimers disease. Which then escalated from the stress of the accident that she took her cat and ripped his right ass cheek then continued on with her day

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock Whose there. Mike Mike seriously I told you to stop coming here or ill call the police But I just wanted to talk to you Ok thats it im calling the police

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why was the boy's face burnt? a horrible accident involving a lighter and some hairspray

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happened when Chuck Norris tried to divide by zero? He found that he was not very good at math, and moved on to another joke concerning himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Dancing Potatoe!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: what weighs 6 ounces sits in a tree and is very deadly? A: a sparrow with a machine gun

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man walks up to a horse and asks, "why the long face?" The horse stares back at him, blankly. The man then sits and ponders his life, sad that he now tries to communicate with horses and realizes that his eccentricity is probably the reason his marriage failed.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

yo mama is so fat she is 1 candy bar away from dieing

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A kangaroo walks into a bar, it is a fairly common occurrence in Australia and normal process is carried out of evacuating the premises and calling animal control to deal with the situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what do you get when a bear and a man mix a really pissed off bear and a dead man

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Spread the net.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops