Why was the black man pulled over? He was going 10 miles over the speed limit.

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A woman walks into a bar. She gets hit on by every guy in the bar. After hours of being hit on she finally has enough and asks the guys to stop. The guys Say "ok im sorry". She leaves.

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So a black man, a white man and a latina walk into a sentence that doesn't end how you expected it to.

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What do you call a gay man who has sex with a woman? A bisexual.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What do you call a black man who is poor, homeless, and HIV positive? Unlucky.

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A man sees a bum laughing. He asks the bum "Why are you laughing", at which point the bum replies "I'm a bum!"

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Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

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the cast of the jersey shore

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Why was Little Susie's IQ less than 30? Because, she is mentally retarted.

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Anti jokes gives me cold sores

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If there's a clown in a blender, how do you get him out? Tostitos.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and is therefore ineligible for a driver's license.

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Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? His dad had just died in a freak accident on the boat. He was going to the funeral that day. Life as a pirate isn't at all as it seems. Little Jimmy the pirate, had nothing. He had no family. His mother dead already, his sister and brother refusing to speak to him because he ran off to be a pirate with his father. Clearly, he had no idea what he was getting into, because his father was gone. What was he to do now? He had no one to go to. The ship mates were all either completly insane or never sober. That very night, Jimmy took the pistol off the ship captian and shot himself point blank in the head. Little Jimmy is in a better place now. With his mother and father. In a place where he cant be harmed any more. I miss you Jim <3. ~ Jack Sullivan

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman and a chest of drawers. The Englishman put a flask of coffee in the top drawer without even looking. Diane hates wrestling.

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What's the difference between Justin Bieber and a gay guy? They're both gay

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an englishman an irishman and a scotsman walked into a bar there was no welshman. they didn't phone him due to his uncontrollable thirst for violence

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How do you kill half the population of Mexico? A preemptive nuclear strike.

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A family of aristocrats walks into a talent agency and shows their performance. The talent agent asks: "How do you call yourselves?" They say: "The Aristocrats", "because that's what we are; Aristocrats."

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Why is Ian a virgin? Because he watches cartoon porn

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Little Jimmy was afraid, and didn't like Santa Claus. So one Christmas Eve, he poured rat poison in Santa's milk. Little Jimmy no longer has parents.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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why did the truck crash into a tree? cause staplers dont know how to drive

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Why couldn't the blonde drive? Because she was 14, thus incapable of having a drivers license

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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