Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

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According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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What do you call someone in Manhattan who goes to see a Broadway show and then stops in at a local bar for a few drinks? A taxi, if they request you do so.

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Your mama's so fat that she has type 2 diabetes.

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A Muslim walked out of a bomb shop.

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why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

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Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

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When I was a kid, I had a clown at my birthday party. He molested me. Later I found out the clown was my dad.

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Two strippers are out of work. So they turn to prostitution.

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Why was the picture so dark? Because it was night time and there were no light fixtures located anywhere near where the photo was taken.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She got shot.

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haha, you're an orphan

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Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A white wall with black and red paint just added onto it recently.

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Why does no one we talk about Nagasaki, they got bombed too...

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Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Pour it.

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When you're climbing up a ladder and you feel something splatter, you may want to see what happened, and then promptly clean up the mess so one one slips.

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Two women were sitting quietly.

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12

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Why doesn't Gary like me? Because I killed his family and fed them to him.

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Q: How do you learn the best break dance moves? A: I don't know. You figure it out.

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Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

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When I see Debra walking her dog in the morning I often ask myself whose walking who!?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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