What's green and has wheels? A snow flake. I lied about the wheels, and the color.

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

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I hate blackniggers

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What's the difference between a baseball player on the Yankees, and one on the Red Sox? One was named Jeff, the other wasn't.

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Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

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What do you call nacho cheese? Stolen.

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What did one deaf mute say to the other deaf mute?

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the real mccoy

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God bless America, and no where else.

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larry clark i smoke pot and im gay its phillup

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Why did the golfer wear two pair of trousers? Because he's a wanker

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Your momma is so fat, that her doctor recommended that she goes on a diet in order to prevent early death caused by a heart problem.

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Wheelchair high jump

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How do you confuse a person from France? By screaming in english at the sky while pionting at him.

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Whats funny about black people getting shot by whites We can steal our bikes back now

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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What sound does a baby make in a blender? Idk, i was too busy masturbating to hear.

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What's the resemblance between a chicken? Its legs are approximately equal, especially the left one.

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What is 2+2? 4!

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My life sucks, I'm about 20 years old, and i haven't changed aged for 15 years, I'm stuck in this dead end fast food job, my colleague hates me, my boss is a money crazed freak, my best friend is a mentally retarded immature weirdo and to top it all off, I live in a pineapple under the sea.

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Doorbell repairman

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who is awesome? no one...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops