What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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A man walks into a store and says "Roses are red, Violets are blue, there is a bomb strapped to my chest, give me all the money"

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What do you call a middle eastern man flying a plane?? A pilot.

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How do you get a clown off a swing Hit it with an axe.

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http://Youtube.com/User/PeGamer22

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Why did Jane scared of the video about a clown dancing in the room? Because it was her room.

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How big is kevins Dick? Idk ask his mom!

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Why does the sultan of Turkey wear red suspenders? So that his pants wouldn't fall down.

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What do you tell the woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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Justin bieber is a loser! One Direction all the way baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<3

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Why did the homeless man get skin cancer Because he didn't have a home so the Suns rays had been directed towards him For 3 years and he was to poor to purchase Sun screen

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Why didn't the boy get his sister a birthday present? Because it wasn't her birthday.

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A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

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A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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Knock knock GET OUTTA HERE! Jesus Christ dude I just came for some eggs!....

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Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

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According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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Your mama's so fat that she has type 2 diabetes.

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A Muslim walked out of a bomb shop.

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What do you call someone in Manhattan who goes to see a Broadway show and then stops in at a local bar for a few drinks? A taxi, if they request you do so.

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Whats red and hurts if it hits you in the face? a brick

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Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

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why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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