whats dirtier than lady gaga's penis in justin bieber's vagina? nothing.

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Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

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How do you save someones life? Do not kill them.

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What's bigger than the Loch Ness Monster? Loch Ness.

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What did the Asian man do when he got lost in the desert? He ate his arms.

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How did the man with no arm and no legs get to the store? Well he certainly didn't walk.

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What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

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What did the black man get on his SAT's? -Barbecue sauce

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motley crew

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What's the difference between red paint and blue paint? One looks like blood and is used a lot in restaurants. The other is blue.

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Why do matt Daly jokes suck? Because he has Downs.

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Why wasn't the boy at his basketball game? - Because he, his twin brother, and pregnant mother all died in a fatal car accident involving a train on the way their.

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what long hard and in a tight hole? a penis in a vagina

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what did the women say when she found out that superman was clark kent. i know that you are superman clark kent.

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Why... ...did the chicken cross the road?

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What did the doctor say to the Jew? You have cancer.

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Q: how do you get a girl with one arm to fall out a tree? Wave and wait for her to wave back.

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When does George Harrison take a shit? In the morning

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

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Why did the frog fall out the tree it was dead. Why did the second frog fall out the tree it was stapled to the first frog. Why did the third frog fall from to the tree peer pressure. Why did the fourth frog fall from the tree the third frog was his son. Why did the fifth frog fall from the tree he thought it was a game. Why did the sixth frog fall from the tree he shared the same body with the fifth frog

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how do you make a dog roll over you kill it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Segregation

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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