I love you You love me Barney gave me HIVS It started with a hug and ended on the floor IVE BEEN RAPED BY A DINOSAUR!

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What do you get when you cross a cantaloupe and a dog? "Melon-choly"

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Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

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Whats hairless, looks like a bel end and stinks of onions. Adey Bradley

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? She's dead.

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Yo mama so fat!... we are very concerned for her health.

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What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

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hi

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What did the Groom give to his Bride on their honeymoon? Herpes.

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How do you crash an airplane? By not knowing how to fly it.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

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What's white and sticky? A sticky polar bear.

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Two Japanese men walked out of a bar. They drowned.

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Do Minnesotans have accents? Oh ya, you betchya.

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Knock Knock Whose there. Mike Mike seriously I told you to stop coming here or ill call the police But I just wanted to talk to you Ok thats it im calling the police

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Knock knock who's there? Hi! where from the church of latter day saints!

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Why do mexicans have so many children??? Because condoms resemble skinny balloons.

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A kangaroo walks into a bar, it is a fairly common occurrence in Australia and normal process is carried out of evacuating the premises and calling animal control to deal with the situation.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind. Also, she's been dead for 43 years.

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A black person and a hispanic person are in a car, who is driving? The black person, after all it's his car.

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Spread the net.

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Why didn't Jim go to the party? He wasn''t invited.

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Why was the boy with a green and blue collared shirt holding a bottle of rice dead at the bottom of the sea? Because he was pushed of a boat and couldn't swim.

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How many rabbits does it take to screw in a light buld? None, it is scientifically impossible for a rabbit to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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