A: Knock Knock (waits for an answer) oh there's no one in.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because the The husband told her to...

What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

Yo mamas so poor, she should probably find a source of consistent payment to support herself.

whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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