Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

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Take part of what?

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A black man walks into a bar. The barman says 'We don't serve your kind here'. The man leaves and goes to a nearby bar that doesn't have racist staff.

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Why was Jesus Christ white? Because it would be a lot better if I had more confidence in myself...

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What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

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A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

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If your Jewish, then don't go to Germany.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

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The man walked into the church and stayed there.

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What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

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And now a word from our sponsors

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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Hickory Dickory Dock, your mother is a whore

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops