Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

What did John name his dog? Doggy

blargen fa-diddle nachen!

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

like most people my age. im 27

hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...