- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what happened to the kid who opened the goldfish? he got eaten by a cixelsyd dinosaur

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man is driving down the highway. He falls asleep at the wheel due to his case of narcolepsy, and dies in a fiery car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what is the germans word for fat dick what is very fat hairy dick

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Yo Mama's so fat that she is at risk for diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did the apple say to the orange, nothing fruits can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

thumb_up thumb_down -1

how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than eating a baby? Eating two babies filled with maggots.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops