A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

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What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

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Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

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What do you call a exceptionally funny anti joke? Well, usually cruel and extremely vile.

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Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

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Why was the boy sad? He was harassed by his mum who died in the 1800's and went into a depressive state in which he drove himself to death using a pair of pliers and a rechargeable battery. No, he really just stubbed his toe.

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did you hear the one about the gay child molester?

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

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How can a black person and a white person be friends? The civil right's movement.

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what is the name of the book that helen keller wrote LADIUFgSLDGFhalkjgfvcgh

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Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

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What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

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Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 10 shots of tequila. He later goes home drunk and beats his wife. His wife is getting a divorce.

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Why did people run from the chicken? Because they didnt want to get bit by the chicken

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What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

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How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

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Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

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What kind of king has 2 heads? A card!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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