How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

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Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

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What's worse than a bee sting? The holocaust What's worse then the holocaust? Two bee stings

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Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

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Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

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Life on the line? I just do it for the kill and the potential savage rape and consumption! And yeah, a man is not a man but a boy if he cant protect his lady friends. HEY WAIT A FUCKING MOMENT! Why you playing so hard to get now? YOUR FLESH IS MINE! It is just like a billion pages ago where we where talking VERY down and dirty.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Q: Why did the bear fall out of the tree? A: Because humans tranquilized him, brought him to an animal shelter 100 miles away from his home. Then after he got out he got hit by a car and died. PETA is watching.....always

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What do tigers dream of when they take a tiger snooze? Mike Tyson

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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I admit I don't know what the future holds, but one thing I know for sure is that... Lance Armstrong has only one ball.

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What do you say to a black man driving a car? Taxi

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Q: What do you call an orange if it isn't orange? A: Nothing. Chances are you won't see it until it has ripened.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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I found my car in the lot with a broken tail-light and a note under the windscreen wipers. I accidentally reversed into your car, Lots of people saw me do it. They all think I'm writing down my name and details, Well, I'm not.

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

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How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

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What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

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Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

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what has two lags and red all over? :a cat in a chinies restrunt...

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"Have you heard the skyscraper joke?" "No." "Oh. Well I don't feel like telling it to you."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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