Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

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Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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Poop

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

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What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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A man walked into a doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

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Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

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How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

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What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

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AARgh my name is AWsaing the nawant of the where of amzai Giant rabbit bunny

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There once was a man from Peru, Whose limericks all stopped on line two.

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Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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