What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Why was lady crying? Because her ten yer old son died of cancer..

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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