Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

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Did you know that you can drink lava? You can only do it once though.

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

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What"s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A Crazy Rhinoceros

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What time is it? 2:47 PM.

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Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

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What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

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What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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What's worse than The Holocaust? Nothing, The Holocaust was a dark and scary time.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

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There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

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Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

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A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

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Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

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whats the diffrences between black people and a tire nothin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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