How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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How does an elephant climb a cliff who cares

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, In Soviet Russia, Poem writes you.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

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roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

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MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

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John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

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Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

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How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

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What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

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An Irish man walks into a bar, and then realizes that he's walked into the wrong establishment (He was looking for an upscale restaurant.)

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A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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