Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

What did the deaf-blind kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

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What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

What do you do when you see a black man with half a head? Stop laughing and reload

Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

A horse walks into a bar. The owner promptly calls a local farmer to let him know that his horse has escaped again.

How meny Jews can you fit in an ash-tray? None. There to big

In soviet Russia, your dead because it doesn't exist anymore

What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

whats better than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees whats better than 1 baby nailed to 10 trees? 10 trees nailed to 1 baby

A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

What dd the man say to his wife? Make me a samich!

a black guy a white guy and a spanish guy walk into a bar, after they left the bar they became good friends despite thier differences.

What's worse then Justin Bieber? 9-11

why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

Whats green and miss centowski hates a gas chamber :D lets be friends

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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