Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

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A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

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Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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What did little Timmy get for Christmas after he was diagnosed with leukemia? A gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond because he was interested in redecorating.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Because she had no arms!

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My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

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Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

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Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

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roses are red violets are black,why is your chest as flat as your back :O

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How old is victor? Half past dead

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Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

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Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

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Young Billy was arrested today for saying he was going to be a terrorist for Halloween.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

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Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

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What did the horse say to the other horse? Nothing, they're both horses

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My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

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Whats the difference between males and females? fe

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Okay

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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