yo mammas so fat when she gets cut gravy pours out

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What do a helicopter and a banana have in common? They are both edible. Except for the helicopter.

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why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

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What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

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knock knock. who's there? interupting doctor. interupting doctor who....you have cancer.

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So this chat, the talk on the phone was all a ruse?

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when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

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Why did the bus crash? Because the bus driver was a potato.

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If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

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Drew Knowles is gay

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The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

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Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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ask me what my temperpedic bed is like. ''whats it like?'' i dont know ive never had one actully.

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Your mother is so fat that she's more prone to cardiovascular disease than other people who stick to the proper BMI or body mass index

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Knock knock, COME IN!

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A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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