What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

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Why did the black man commit suicide? Because he was killed by a white cop.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

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a horse walks into a bar. Noticing the potentially dangerous situation everyone leaves, the bartender calls RSPCA who come and retrieve the horse and order is restored.

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What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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What is duke oxtoby? legend.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and blind.

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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So there was this kid who was sitting on a stool, and the stool started moving. He then realized that stools do not move, so he got up and ran away as quickly as he could.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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whats red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your best friend, and I'll always be there for you.

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What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops