What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

jack be nimble jack be quick jack is a parapeligic.....there's no need for more

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two men walk into a bar, get drunk, and drive home. Unfortunately, they crash into a tree and are mortally wounded.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We are here to inform you that your daughter has died in a drunk driving accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you get a black guy down from your tree? You can't, because there aint any.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats fluffy, multicolored, and dances like a disco santaclaus? i don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is worse then dying of testicular cancer? Living of testicular cancer and having one amputated?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is the hardest thing about eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Josh brown loves Jessica Potts from Dylan xoxo

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the little boy fall down?? Because a terrorist shot him

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats the difference between a cow and a sheep a cow goes baa and a sheep goes moo

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What store adopted the dog ? The Pound

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you say to a confused blond? You help her with her conundrum.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Your mom is so ugly that you should buy her a paper bag to cover her face because she is just so very unattractive that it burns mine and everyone else's eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did the black women name her child jamaal

thumb_up thumb_down -2

whats the same about a red crayon and a blue crayon? there both the same color except for the blue one

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop? Depends. Are you applying a lot of pressure and licking in short, round bursts, or are you softly suckling on the treat? Your mouth's pH level is also a determining factor, as the sucker digests at a quicker rate the higher the acid content. To put it simply, there is no correct answer, because the sheer quantity of variables makes it a tootsie-less endeavor. See how I said tootsie-less rather than fruitless? Now that's a real joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops