3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

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"Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's parents?" "No" "Neither has he"

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Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

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How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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Your mom is so poor she can't afford to buy herself nice things.

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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What did the jew say to the black man? I'm jewish

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

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haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

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Its a bird!! Its a plane!! No, its a bird.

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What did the customer say to the waiter when he found a fly in his soup? Sorry to bother you on your break, but why didn't I get a fly in MY soup?

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race-car = rac-ecar

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One day a kid said to his mom: "Mom, I painted the bed sheets with your lipstick". So his mom got mad.

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A chink walks into a bar. She is spotted by the secret police and instantly deported. Vote UKIP

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q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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(Played Basketball for 15 years) I TOLD YOU I'D QUIT WHEN LeBron Gets A RING

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How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

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My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

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Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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