An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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A dog was barking at a tree

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Oh because you have Lou Gehrigs Disease

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Whats worst than a cold? Being shot in the face repeatadly by a rocket launcher until death.

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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If you work at Penn State you might want to skip the annual "bring your kid to work day"

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How high is the grass in Germany? Approximately the same height as the grass in America.

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One early Christmas morning i went downstairs. My mother told me that she had gotten me the ultimate stocking stuffer. It was a foot

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A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

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knock know. who there?.............. whose there?.........whose there!?!?! damn kids

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My dog barks when someones at the door.

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What do you call a man covered with cottoncandy and goes to the store and buys a jar of pickles? George

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As he stood in her front yard with a boombox in the pouring rain, she leaned her head out the window with a smile and he was electrocuted.

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Larry The Cableguy....thats it.

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What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

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scraggle is in you pillow case

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So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

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What do you say to a cat with a helmet on? Silly cat, you rhyme with hat but you shouldn't wear one.

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

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A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops