Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house in her back yard? -No Neither did she

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Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

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Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

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If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

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Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

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Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

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What's the difference between Santa and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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Why don't they have any badminton courts in the jungle? There just isn't the demand.

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Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

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Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

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What do you get we you mix a ginger with gasoline? A forest fire.

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What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops