There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

chuck norris and superman had a bet. Chuck norris immediatley won because superman is a fictional character played by an actor. Chuck norris then decided to have a bet with the actor that played superman and lost

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

thumb_up thumb_down +18

they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy! But here's my switchblade Get in the trunk.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops