What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

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Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

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Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

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What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

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why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

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why wuz 6 afraid of 7 7 had a gun

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How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

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A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

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Doctor! I have no problems at all! So, uh why are you here? Isnt that freaking weird? Wow, that might be a problem! Puh! I have a problem then. Yeah, goodbye!

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A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a killer

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Q:Whats evil ,not funny and on wheels A:The Holocost on wheels

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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