What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q. How many infants does it take to paint a wall? A. Depends how hard you throw them...

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

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THAT AWKWARD MOMENT... nuff said

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies " My daughter just died of leukemia."

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How do you help a black person find a job ? Tell them places that are hiring.

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Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

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once upon a time jess was happy this once upon a time was a very long time ago, BABADOOK !

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I went to the local RSPCA office today....it's tiny, you couldnt swing a cat in it.

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roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

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What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

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I wrote a funny joke.

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Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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