- Anti Joke

Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

Shelly tells Rob to go home... Thats what she said

You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

Q: What do you call half of the worlds population of black people on the moon. A: Close enough.

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

Text Klarens at 317-653-8695. Tell him crazy shit or send crazy pictures.

Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

red is black green is black i'm batman i'm white,

What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

why was one black guy surrounded by ten white guys...... he was a story teller.

Q: What are the best kind of jokes? A: The funny ones.

Hey i just raped you and this is crazy so delete my number and keep the baby

Here's a riddle... A cowboy rides into town on saturday, stays for three days, and leaves on saturday... How does he do it? Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... OH... I'M DONE NOW...

Why black people are so good at football? Because they have white feet.

Why did the little girl fall of the swing? Because she had no arms.

How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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