What did the old man get for Christmas? He forgot because he has alzheimer's

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What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

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A man walks into a store. He purchases what he was intending to, walks out, and gets on with his day.

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What stars with C, is hairy on the outside, moist on the inside and ends with T and has UN in the middle? Coconut

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So a guy walks up to a gay guy and says: "You are a fag." The gay guy says: "That is very offensive, you jerk." So the guy says: "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know what it meant" and the gay guy says: "I accept your apology." Then the gay guy crosses the street and gets hit by a bus

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh wait... I'm blind.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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Penis-biter

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Guess what? That is actually a ridiculously broad question, and I can be referring to anything. You really have no chance in guessing "what" is. As a matter of fact, I can just be thinking about a thought of something else, which is not even a concrete thing. Therefore, you really have no chance of guessing what "what" actually is. So I win. You lose.

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Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

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A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck had AIDS?

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* pretend your an orphan Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

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Paul was mowing his lawn when he felt a bump. It turned out it was a bunny. Paul felt bad but the bunny felt worse

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This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

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who is 2 chainz? no one 2 chains is just 2 chains. spelled with an "s" not a "z"

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Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

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What did Tim's grandma get him for his birthday? Nothing, because Tim's grandma died in a car accident 2 years ago

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what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

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what happened when the boy jumped? he landed

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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p

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whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

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What grows on trees and is woody? Wood.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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