whats worse than the black death. Bieber Fever

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What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

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I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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Q:what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? A:get in the batmobile

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Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

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whats the difference between an orange and a dead baby? one is a tasty treat and the other is an orange

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whats up and also down? your mum

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What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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What kind of Mexican makes no money? A Mexican without a job.

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How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.

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What's the difference between video games and a naked chick? The Holocaust.

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What do you get when you mix a Refrigerator with a dog? Nothing. That would be impossible.

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Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Pfft. Stupid. Apples are for healthy people. Go for the ice cream. There's no worms in that.

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welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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