Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

Why do girls think they deserve the very best? Because if an ugly girl in twilight can find a hunky vampire and ripped werewolf why can't they. And let's not forget those crappy Disney princess movies.

You had ONE job. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to support your dying wife and ill child.

A: Did you know that cashews come from a fruit? B: Not really. This is an interesting fact. Any other facts you have? A: yes ("A" was lying)

give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

Man one: Why does the moon look like a face? Man two: I don't know, why? Man one: I don't know either, that's why i asked....

A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

What's big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

You know whats annoying? Steve

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

What should you do when your husband is staggering in the back yard Shoot him again

whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

3 guys walks into a park. Which one was holding the beer? None, all 3 guys were elementary kids

Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

how many dumbasses does it take to make a kushagra

We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

How do you drown a blonde? Intentionally attempting to drown anyone, regardless of their hair color, is murder which is illegal and morally wrong to do.

What is the same about a Duck and a Pickle? Neither of them can ride a bike.

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

Q. Why is Obama stupid? A. That's an opinion, therefore i cannot answer that.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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