what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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A blonde dies Lololol

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a black guy board a plane. Who gets kicked off first? The jew for his unruly behavior towards the flight attendant.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven has an extra penis

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Mommy, why did daddy leave? Because you touch yourself at night sweetie.

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what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

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Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

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What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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Johny wanted a pogo stick for his birthday. Johny's mom got him a pogo stick for his birthday. The day of Johny's birthday, he fell off the pogo stick and broke his arm.

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

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What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

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Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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A black man walks down a high street and sees a white woman approaching. He bids her good day and they carry on their respective journeys. He then turns around and follows the white woman and rapes her in a dark alleyway, because as we all know, all black men are rapists.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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