Yesterday, my friend said I should facebook him. So I slammed a book into his face.

Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

your mama's so fat she wears big clothing

Roses are red, violets are blue, my life didn't start, until I met you! :) Megan _____

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

dead dibbs

what did the window say to the other window nothing they are both inanimate objects

Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

What do you call a black guy who flys a plane? A pilot.

What do you do when you see four black people and a Jew? You buy them

Of course, you have always found more joy in seeing others happy, that pursuing your own happiness.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

your so fat. your fat!

were you expecting a joke

Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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