Q: Whats the difference between a Jewish man and a pizza? A: Jew's are humans and can feel emotions, as for pizza's can not feel emotions, because they are pizzas.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you fit an elephant inside your car? I don't understand why this task would even need to be performed. I have never arrived anywhere in my car and thought "Sure could use an elephant right about now..."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's brown and hides in the closet? The Diarrhea of Anne Frank.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Mike: Hey Dave knock knock Dave: Come in!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock eater,

thumb_up thumb_down +3

was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What color is an orange chicken? Fried rice

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Please save our environment :) Dont use electricity. Use gas! Like Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Wath black poeple eat for christmas your food.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

knock knock come in

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Okay

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops