Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

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Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

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A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

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Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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What looks like a black book but is actually white? I don't know because it can't look like a black book if it's white.

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Women's rights.

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What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

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A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

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Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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Are you kidding? If you can slow down time when stressed, then that means that your perception of time is, well... Oh relative, but still wow! What about now though? Can you do it? And for curiosity`s sake, what if you jumped off a roof? Would the stress make it all really slow?

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

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What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

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what do you call a black man flying an airplane a pilot, you racist

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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