your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

Chuck Norris isn't afraid of the dark. Because he's a grown man, and most grown men aren't afraid of the dark.

whats red and hard to eat a brick.

What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

So these two girls have a cup .

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

What is worse than being eaten alive by a shark? Being force fed live goat intestines while Kevin Spacey rapes your father.

Why did Hitler kill himslef? He saw his gas bills.

Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

War horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long film?'

my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

Why was the guy not asleep Because he was awake

What animal wouldn't you want to play games with? Probably none of them. They are animals and incapable of playing board games.

a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

What was the last thing that went into the head of the space pilot of the Challenger shuttle right before it crashed? He was probably thinking about his wife and family...

Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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