No really, try this: You: Say "knock, knock" Your friend: OK, knock knock You: Who's there? Your friend: ...... [this awkward pause makes evident the fact that it has now dawned on your friend that he has to generate content for a joke that he wasn't telling in the first place]

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being hit by a plane.

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How do you make an egg laugh? That is an irrational question eggs are inanimate object and are unable to laugh

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Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because the weather report said there was a 90% chance of rain, and he didn't want to get his posh new coat wet on the way to the studio

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Why don't you ever want to greet your friend Jack on the plane? Because your wife cheated on you with him and she is having his baby, if you were to even think about talking to Jack, you'd end up slitting his throat and throwing him off the side of the plane into a crocodile pit where they will make a feast of his body for the next couple days... So just don't greet Jack

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

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Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

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Why did the potato cross the road? It didn't. A potato is a vegetable. It cannot walk, think or speak.

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

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Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

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What's the difference between an apple and a baby. An apple is a fruit. A baby is a human being.

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Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

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Eric is gay Ha

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What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops