roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

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What begins with "B" and ends with "N" that you never want to call your neighbor? a Black Person

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why was the little boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face.

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So a baby seal walks into a club...

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They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

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Stop reading these anti-jokes and go study for your externals!

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Why was Billy's grandma not around for Thanksgiving? Because she's dead

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Roses are red Violets are blue These are facts that many people know

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

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What's another word for Manslaughter? My new Hobby

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how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

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Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

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What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

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Yo mama's so fat because her BMI is considered obese on the scale.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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