What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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Before her maiden voyage, they told the Titanic she could become anything. So she became a submarine.

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What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm Animals

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Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

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how do fit 104 jews in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 100 in the ash tray.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke....? A pig rolling in mud!

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What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

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Q: What is the difference between Jimmy and a kite A: Jimmy is higher MR

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What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

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where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

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Roses are red Violets are blue I kinda have a bad memory What are we doing again?

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What do you call a person without any arm no legs and a eye patch? names

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

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Why was the cancer patient often bullied by his peers? Because he happened to be an extremely bad person. He often annoyed people, was intransigent and often aggravated those around him causing them to bully him.

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a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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a guy walked into a bar, ordered a drink, sipped it slowly thinking of his waisted youth. then he finished his drink and went home to his wife of 34 years

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what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

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Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

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Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

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1 + 1 = 2 If it was equal to 11 the problem would be impossible

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops