whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

whats cold, blue and hard? a frozen blueberry.

What was the little boys least favorite part of Christmas? Getting raped by his uncle.

Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

Why did the man turn up at his friend's funeral dressed as Mickey Mouse? Because it would have been disrespectful not to attend.

How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

What's sad about black people that drink grape soda and eat fried chicken? The stereotypes are true.

How do mummies keep there secrets wrapped up? They are dead.

what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

roses are red violets are black,why is your chest as flat as your back :O

what did the boy with cancer get for christmas? i dont know he's jewish

Why am I telling you this joke? Because I entered the following, agreed to the Terms of Service, and clicked "submit".

What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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