What does the homosexual arab who plays football who has a best friend called Dave enjoy doing? Playing football.

When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

Your mother is so large she finds it difficult to fit into regular sized clothing

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

What's the worst part about eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheel chair.

roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

A man asks a young boy to get in his van. The kid, being very well-educated tells the man he cannot talk to strangers. So, the man tells the kid he understands, and drives away to another nearby child.

What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

all these jokes are horrible now

Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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