Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

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Q: On a plane, a black man does not grab a bag of peanuts, while everyone else does. Why? A: He has allergies.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? I like guys... cause I'm gay.

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Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 sodomized his whole family.;

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there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

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Whats the worst thing your parents could ever do to a teenager? Take there phone.

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What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

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whats the difference between a dead body and a car with doors that open in a diagnal manner one was never alive to begin with

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The Qur'an

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my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

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What did casey anthony say when the ruled her as not guilty? "yay"

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whats worse than finding 10 dead baby's in 1 garbage can... finding 1 dead baby's in 10 garbage can

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Why was the chocolate black? It's not black you idiot, its white

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Why did the chicken cross the road?? Because he felt like it okay!!! Just let him be!!!

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the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

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A man walks into a bar and takes a seat at the bar stool. He then proceeds to look over and said a man in a suit and tie open up the window , jumps, and begins to float in mid air. In amazement he approaches the man. He says " That's amazing! How do you do that?" The man in the suit and tie replies "Drink this liquid and you will be able to fly." The man with excitement quickly rushes to the window, opens it, and suddenly falls to his death. The bartender says to the man with the suit and tie " Superman, you're a real dick when your drunk."

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

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A blind man walks into a bar. The shopkeeper says, "the bar is nextdoor." The man walks out.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm bitten in half in your apple.

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Well I think that anti jokes are stupid.

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why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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