How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

Why was everyone screaming bloody murder? Their home team won

Why did the cookie go to the doctor, beause he was feeling really crumby...becuase he has testicular cancer

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

Why did the little boy grow up to be a homosexual man? He didn't find the female reproductive system sexually appealing

whats worse than not being able to hear? not being able to breath fvd n avt were here

What do you call a black person pimping out his bitches? a dog breeder.

Roses are red, violets are blue; So give me head, or I queue you!

What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

Why did the guy run out of the whorehouse? Because when she spread her legs it looked like she was pulling apart a grilled ham and cheese sandwich.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

If your fighting an octopus on mars how many lamps does it take to repair a dog house? Nine because a toaster cannot ride a bicycle.

A woman walks up to a man in a supermarket and asks him where she can find the potatos. He says "I think they are all the way at the end on aisle 3" "Thanks" she says. Then she gets to aisle 3, and there aint no potatos!!!!

What's black and white and read all over? Corn, I lied about everything.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

HELLO EVERYONE

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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