If you pull a pin out of a grenade, is it possible to put it back? I need a quick answer for this question.

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What's the difference between my mom, and a bag of garbage? A bag of garbage is incapable of contracting aids

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What do you call a zebra with no stripes? A zebra with no stripes

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What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

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Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

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A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

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Help i have fallen and i cannont get up Life alert life alert To bad just sit there we dont care

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How do spell____? awk moment when u try asking someone how to spell something over text but they have no idea what ur saying

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Whats circular and black? a black circle.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite. He died the following day.

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Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

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What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

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A horse walks into a bar. A chicken crosses the road. Humanity is no more. Nature reclaims the Earth.

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Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

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Whats sad about 6 mexicans driving off a cliff in an escalade? An escalade sits 7 people.

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hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have alzheimers, hey i just met you

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An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

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I bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands, when they first came out. Well, I say bought. I actually stole it from a short, fat ginger kid.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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...and the rabbit says, "How 'bout that schnitzel!"

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Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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