Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

Q: Why did the black man win the 100 meter dash? A: Because ever since he heard of this event, he has spent weeks preparing for it.

A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other side

Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

Yo dawg, I heard you like cars. Thats cool, whats your favorite one?

Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

knock knock whos there? your mom really? well whats she wearing a refridgerator.

WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

What happens when you mix a platinum blond with a black kid? A young african-american child with un-naturally died hair.

What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

If a man is called a manly man, what is a dude called? A dudely dude.

What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

What do you call a bunch of white men sitting on a bench? The NBA.

Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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