What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

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Whats green, furry and it stole christmas? A Robber with a Christmas tree on his back

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A bison trots into a bar. The bartender says, "My pee makes bubbles in the toilet." Amazed by the urination fact, the bison explodes.

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How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

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What's worse than being a Jew in the Holocaust? Nothing.

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A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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Whats the difference between a white guy and a black guy? They have different colors of skin.

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What dd the man say to his wife? Make me a samich!

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You know why one side of the "v" formation of a flock of geese is longer don't you? Cause it has more geese in it.

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Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

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What do you call a black man holding a stone with bloody hands A hard working stone mason

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

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Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

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How do you get an elephant in the fridge in three moves open the door, put it in, close the door How do you put an giraffe in the fridge in four moves open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, and close the door

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What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

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What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

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What do you call a college student who never studies? An irresponsible person

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

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No it doesnt..

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Whats blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz. Whats pink and fuzzy? Blue fuzz that's embarrassed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops