Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies.

A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

why was six afraid of seven? prison changes a person

What do you get when you cross a dog with an anteater? An animal unlikely to survive beyond infancy.

What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Columbine Massacre

This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

What did the one Brick say to the other Brick? We have the same name.

Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to give it a female name.

Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

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Knock knock. Who's there? Stop fucking around I told you I was coming. I'm sorry. Come in.

What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

How do you kill a beetle? Wait outside his apartment and shoot him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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