why do women have small feet. so they can stand closer to the sink

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Two men are talking at a bar. They both order the same drink but are charged different prices. Angered, one of them men confronts the bartender. A fight breaks out and the bartender is seriously injured.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Whats funnier than a real joke? An anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +26

There once was a genie With a sevenfoot weenie And he went to the lady next door She thought it was a snake So she hit it with a rake And then he murdered the shit out of her.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Your mom is so fat that her BMI is in the morbidly obese column.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he wa depresed

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q: Why can't Helen Keller drive? A:Because she is a woman A: She is blind deaf and dumb A: No seriously because she is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's 9 +10 19

thumb_up thumb_down +24

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do a large mouth bass and my wife have in common? They are both in the Animal kingdom, both are vertebrates and they share many other traits such as eyes, a notochord, and epaxial/hypaxial musculature.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are flowers jordan does it for hours xxxxif ya know what i mean

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Aaron Cummings is me. Find me on facebook:)

thumb_up thumb_down +22

I'm ginger no more needs to be said...

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a man with 3 legs and one arm jumping on a trampoline? By his name.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and and no legs in front of a door? A: A quadruple amputee.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Wife: My husband is dead! Son: Sounds like a personal problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

If John has 50 candy bars, and he eats 45, how many cadybars does John have? Diabetes, John has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops