What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Well, she did.

What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

What do old people really like? Anal sex.

What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

a man is stranded on a deserted island with no food, water or clothing and he comes upon a magical genie lamp, a genie pops out and tells him that he has three wishes, the man asks for food,water, and clothing, the genie says "of course" the man was elated but then the genie says " but i'm afraid to tell you that genies don't exist and your hallucinating from your harsh living conditions...i'm sorry" the man lived two more weeks before dying slowly...

Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

Chuck Norris is so strong, he can lift really heavy things without hardly even trying.

Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

Har har hey

How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

Why did Sally drown? She wasn't wearing a life jacket and it was the the seventh time she had fallen off her water skis today. Her father was not coming back this time.

-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

How do you keep a mexican from drowning? Take your foot off the back of his head.

Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he has no arms or legs. Why doesn't he have any arms or legs? Because he is a potato.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...