What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

"Lack of sleep" is that like... Sleep deprivation?

Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

Why did the young man visit the optometrist? Because when he went to put in his contacts earlier that morning, he dropped one on the carpet and couldn't find it and it was his last pair so he needed to go order new ones but it had been over a year since he had been to the optometrist so they make you come get your eyes checked before you make a new order to decide whether the lens strength should remain the same or be increased/decreased.

Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

Seen the new batman movie? [spoiler] the audience dies

What has two thumbs and cancer? This guy.

What do you call a sexually abusive man. Dad.

What's black, white and red all over? Multi- racial genocide.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

You know what's funnier than 24? 25.

how many people can you eat? well, im not canniballistic, so none unless i was starving.

What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

what did the angry asian man do after chrashing his car? He died later in the hospital that night from a combination of severe head trauma, internal bleeding, and various fractures.

Whats better than 1 dollar? 2 dollars.

Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

Do you know what a lion really is? It's an over sized cat.

Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

What do you call a pakie flying a plane The pilot... or a terrorist it up to you

if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

My brother found snow in his hair from last year... only people who know me know this joke!!haha -sopie

A man heard a thundering sound. It was thunder.

what is worse then breaking on arm breaking two arms what is worse then breaking two arms the holocaust what is then the holocaust Obama care.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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