What doesn't have opposable thumbs, barks at the mail man, eats dog food, and is good at every sport? Air bud

Whats the difference between an elephant and a tomato. You put tomatos in a salad.

Womens rights

Do you know what they say? Words

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

What do you call someone in Manhattan who goes to see a Broadway show and then stops in at a local bar for a few drinks? A taxi, if they request you do so.

Whats red and hurts if it hits you in the face? a brick

Knock Knock Who's There Gary Oh hi Gary, come in

Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she has no arms Why can't she get back up? Because she has no legs Why won't anyone help her up? Because she's a woman.

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

What do you call: A black person, A white person, A mexican, A Jew, And an athiest? Whatever their names are!

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She got shot.

Q: What did Batman say to get robin into the Batmobile? A: Robin, get in the Batmobile!

A dentist, a librarian, a construction worker, a gynecologist, a zookeeper, a shoemaker, a terrorist, a politician, a cyclist, a truck driver, a kangaroo, a Mexican, a blonde, a Jewish black guy, a Honda Civic, a monkey, a penguin, an FBI agent, a stock broker, a president of a foreign country, a CEO of a very wealthy company regarding AIDS, a founder of one of top downloaded apps in the market, a chief executive, a cook, a waitress, a priest, a nun, a little boy, a fairy, a dinosaur, and a skeleton walks into a bar. There's no punchline.

When you're climbing up a ladder and you feel something splatter, you may want to see what happened, and then promptly clean up the mess so one one slips.

why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

AVB

A: ask me if I'm a truck. B: why? A: just ask me. B: are you a truck? A: no.

What do you say when you take a nasty shit in you friends bathroom? There's some nasty shit in there.

What's worse than this joke? Taking a dump on an airplane as it crashes in to the World Trade Center.

Why doesn't Gary like me? Because I killed his family and fed them to him.

Why did the little girl get a haircut? A; she has cancer.

who steals more than a black person?, a pirate.

who likes it up the anus? jason frisone at saybrook ave 08094 williamstown new jersey thats who

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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