Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A panda bear walks into a bar. The bartender then alerts the zoo of the whereabouts of their missing panda.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I went to the game and saw a Mexican wave. So I waved back at him.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

God bless America, and no where else.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

since when?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the golfer wear two pair of trousers? Because he's a wanker

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the tallest building in the world? A library cause it has so many stories get it haha.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others dont

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I went to visit my friend last week (not a guy, guys as friends? Thats just gay, I mean you fuck all of your friends right?) And she was really happy and stuff right? I mean REALLY happy, and the poor thing was depressed for like 8-9 months or something. So I was like: ARE YOU HIGH RIGHT NOW? >:( She said: YEAH I AM HIGH ON LIFE! I looked down at the ground, it contained a full box full of syringes and needles! So I grabbed the whole thing and threw them out! So then I learned what Insulin was anyways. Ps: Depressed, pregnant... Not sure anymore, it was like two weeks ago or something.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did sally fall of the swing? SHE HAD NO ARMS!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they turned around and went home

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man finds a lamp on the beach so decides to rub it. Nothing happens.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between me and convicted pedophile? -The pedophile's been caught ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Black People.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

a guy gets knocked out and wakes up in a alley all bloody and a knife next to him!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Goku: KAAAAAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE Freezebox: HOLY SHI... Narrator: Will Goku ever finish his attack? Will Freezebox stand there like a fucking bitch afraid for the next 48 damn epiodes rather than take a step to the side? Will the "Zee" fighters ever do anything else but comment the trucking obvious and stop aborting the show with their sweat? Find out in the next episode of... Moral: DRAGONBULL ZHIT!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why did the poet kill the blackchicken? as a source of inspiration for his poultry

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call a black man on the moon? An Astronaut.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did Captain Hook die? He wiped.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: Why isn't Michael Jordan able to jump into space with only 1 leap? A: If that were possible, the supposedly absolute laws of physics would've been irreversibly violated to the full extent that the future of science would be in trouble and the future of some already mentally-unstable people would've been deeply jeopardized to a state that they couldn't naturally recover from.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the blind and deaf woman get for her birthday? Raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

whats funny ? not you i am telling the joke around here

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops