I spilled Spot Remover on my dog. Now he is blind and has chemical burns all over his body.

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A Jew and a German walk in a bar. they've accepted their peoples past and learned to move on with their lives

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

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24!

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How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Goofy sold Pluto into slavery in exchange for the power of human speech.

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A woman walks into a bar. She gets hit on by every guy in the bar. After hours of being hit on she finally has enough and asks the guys to stop. The guys Say "ok im sorry". She leaves.

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what did the turkey say on thanks giving? Nothing, he's dead, we ate him!

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How do you determine the population of mexico? Send out a census every 4 years.

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What did Don King do with his new boxers? Put them on with a respectable pair of trousers.

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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What happened to the adventurer ? He took an arrow to the knee and became a guard.

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What do you call a successful black man who has it all? A hip hop artist.

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Whats the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair? Cancer.

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who likes it up the anus? jason frisone at saybrook ave 08094 williamstown new jersey thats who

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How do you tell if there is an elephant in your refrigerator? Check for footprints in the butter.

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Why couldn't the eleven year old get into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-14 and he was unaccompanied by a mature adult.

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whats worse then a baby with out floaties?.......beating your grandma to death with a puppy

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How many blind people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Does it matter?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Barrack Obama shops at Baby Gap

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so there are two muffins. no wait there are three muffins in an oven. actually it was a toaster oven. and they were covered in butter. uuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhh cheese on toast anyone?

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get on your knees and make a donut face:)

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Q: How do you get a one armed blond of of a tree? A: You grab a ladder and help her down safely.

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Kid: Hey,can i have all the answers to this test please. Teacher: What the hell kid im the fricken teacher.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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