What do you call a fish with no "eyes" Dead

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Three surfers paddle out into the surf. They had a pretty good time, except one of them got a shit ton of water up his nose.

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why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

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Alex Eggbert

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A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't, there were no roads back then

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Whats red and eats like dog? A fox.

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A christian was diagnosed with cancer. He refused chemo and prayed to god. Eventually, he died.

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How do you make a black man cry? Stab his wife.

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what did the american say to the other american? get out of the way i gotta go to mcdonalds!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had sinned.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

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What can't taste with a toung, and it's soul never dies? A shoe

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How do you get an asian out of a rice field? Napalm.

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Q: whats worse than getting aids? A: Giving your mom aids.

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What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

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¿melano?

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What Does the Duck Say? "Got any grapes?"

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

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A friend asks his buddy, "Hey, what's your favorite color?" Buddy slowly turns his head and stares intensely at the only black person in the room and says," "White." Buddy has never been called racist.

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why was the boy's face burnt? a horrible accident involving a lighter and some hairspray

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I'm off to my tank guys!

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What do you call a unicorn without a horn? A horse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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