What is the biggest lie in the universe? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q:How did the blonde commit suicide? A: She didn't, she sought help and was able to live a very happy life with a beautiful family in a nice suburb outside of Cincinnati.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A blonde walked into a phone pole.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the cat have hair? Because he did.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

do you wanna hear a joke cutsforbieber#

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the Black Man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the baby cross the road? It was being dragged by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a prison inmate with no arms or legs? John. That's his name.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a man who leaves his wife and kids to be with another woman? A dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the leper go back into the shower? he missed a spot.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Poop

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A woman walks into a bar and orders a pint of ale. "Are you a Lesbian?", joked the barman. "Yes", replied the woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why was the boy laying on the ground? he got shot in the head

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why are white people not good at basketball? Because they aren't black.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

:/ Meh, I am just a side character anyways... Dont really care...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

If she's old enough for jail, than shes old enough to rail.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

how many dead babys can fit in a bathtub 17

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I saw a shovel once.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Generally one, however, in cases where the light fixture is unusually high, a ladder may be necessary. Some people like having a second person hold the ladder as they climb it. In this unconventional circumstance, it would take precisely two Jews to change a lightbulb. Also, Jews are bad people.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Good boy

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A panda bear walks into a bar. The bartender then alerts the zoo of the whereabouts of their missing panda.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why couldn't little Sarah smell the roses? Her face was mauled by a grizzly bear

thumb_up thumb_down -15

An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops