Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

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Two fish are in a tank. The first one says, "How the heck do I drive this thing!".

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Women's rights.

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When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Honey, are you hearing things again? Nobody knocked on the door... Honey-are-you-hearing-things-again-nobody-knocked-on-the-door who? ...

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yo momma so fat, it appears she has two chins

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Oh shit my gardens on fire

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A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

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Jumping out of an airplane without a parachute is a once in a lifetime expeirence.

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why did the girl die. because she was bullied and abused everyday by her family and friends. she was homeless and was forced to drop a bomb on her own forest. there fore she stabbed herself.

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Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? A: "Here come the elephants over the hill!"

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Whats better then a guard llama two Guard llamas

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Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on?

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what did one dog say to his sex partner? woof woof

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Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

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what did the blind kid boy get for Christmas? he doesn't know because his parents are mute.

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Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Jim Jim who? Oops, wrong house.

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roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

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Things that have changed since I was a kid. Turtles: My time, awesome. Today: Shredder is a human which is not a human but actually a Krang, but his daughter which is not his daughter because he is a freaking krang, has a sex thing for Leonardo which is a turtle (the blue one, whatever his name is). Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: My time? Well it was awesome back then, fine I admit it, I might have been a bit biased but still, I enjoyed the hell out of it, there where five rangers and yeah that Asian bitch that gave me a boner as a kid made a green one which she giftwrapped to the rest of the team, then some white ranger showed up... But I never watched anything with the white guy, I had lots interest years ago by then (Still play that fighting game for the Snes and thats why I know there is a fucking white ranger... And deathbattle okay) Today: Power Rangers Neon, Power Rangers Tetris, Power Rangers Ultra Power, Power Rangers Sexfighters, Power Rangers Nazi, Power Rangers Texas Rangers, Power Rangers Color, Power Rangers Multiforce Orbital Neo Neon.... And thats just like 03 percent of the variants right? Moral: As a kid we always had a lol when the Asian chick turned into Yellow ranger and did a split kick, which kinda revealed she had a massive dick between her legs... Later we understood that she was a he and that the Ranger Segments are recorded in Japan... Probably by a Hermafrodite... Nah, a guy fine. Oh, and we always lolled at how "gay" the original blue ranger acted he was supposed to be Nerd but I was like eight and was like "lol he just seems gay"... Just for it to turn out that he quit the series because supposedly the rest of the actors mocked him for being gay, Wow thats... Weird.

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what happened when a duck flew over the hunter during duck hunting season? the hunter shot at the bird, but fortunately, the hunter was nit very good so the duck flew back to his wife and children by the pond.

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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How to smash an apple Iphone <<<<<< Use A Hammer >>>>>>> PS : if u want to break a hammer use an iphone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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