What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

don't do anything i wouldn't do first

Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

Yeah, but why is this honesty so important for you, personal reasons because you are like that, because you consider me a friend? Or because a single lie, could have catastrophical consequences?

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

Knock, knock who's there? Not your Dad, because he left and created a better family.

Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

A handicapped man walks into a bar...

My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

How many people were trampled on Black Friday this year? Not enough.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

The Grinch stole Christmas, he accidentally dropped it and Christmas was ruined for everyone life sucked -shane,Adam,David and Riley go cry about it

What do you call a black man chasing after a macdonalds van? The fastest thing in the dessert.

why does everyone like this website? ... because every other joke a little baby is dying.

Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

Roses are red violets are blue your dads got hair what happened to you

why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

What happened when the nigga looked up his family tree? A gorilla shit in his face

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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