Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

thumb_up thumb_down -8

where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a white guy sitting on a bench? The NBA.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A white man and a drunken black man enters the bar, the bartender calls the cop and the black man is dragged into the police car. The black man screams YOU ARE RACIST! YOU DAMN RACISTS! The cops tell him he has been walking around the streets naked the last 2 days... Oooh... I am really sorry sir says the black man. He was forgiven and went sober forever. Moral: No moral, that is the anti moral in this anti joke...and besides I am a W class celebrity.enjoy life

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did dyslexic Old McDonald say? . . . I have a learning disability that impairs my fluency and comprehension accuracy in being able to read and spell

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

a

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is lil Wayne's real name? Dwayne micheal carter jr.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

thumb_up thumb_down -10

If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock knock! Just kidding.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other boy fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third boy fall out of the tree? Prepressure

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being brutally murdered as you are watching your guts spilling out of your body

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops