how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

What's the time when black men take over? Poor past never.

Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

What do a black lesbian, Adolf Hitler and Jesus have in common? They are all the subject of this question.

Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

the power to turn magnetism into light

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

kara is funny she loves her money so she buys a bunny for her honey

What do you call postman pat without a job? Pat.

Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

A construction worker walks into a bar. He says "Ow! That hurt!" And walked in the opposite direction to the manager to complaint about the obvious health code violations of this site.

What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

Why was Little Timmy crying ? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus. Knock-Knock! Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

Why did the Democrat cross the road? Because the glorious leader ordered it for all minions

Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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