a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A 16 year old boy and girl have unprotected sex. The girl becomes pregnant and decides to keep the baby. They both drop out of high school, get lots of government cheese, and the boy holds a steady job as manager at the local mcdonalds for the rest of his life.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How did the little boy with cancer run in his running race??? Very Well....

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

My aunt always said slow and steady wins the race She died in a fire

thumb_up thumb_down -23

DINOSAUR Street Fighter 4: Masterchief edition LOUND ONE! BAKE! And the final results: Sagat: Heh, you want some... cornflakes? *BOOO! YOU THUG!" Ryu: WHOWANTSSOMEPOUNDCAKE! *Delicious poundcake omg" "Well, at least better than serving a fucking bowl of foocking cornflakes with milk in four goddamn hours!" YOU LOSE! "You must defeat my Poundcake to stand a chance, I am the worlds greatest pillow fighter!" GAME OVER

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what did the obese kid get for chistmas? an athsma attack ,which led to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

guess what what ...

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

thumb_up thumb_down -23

There once was a student named Bob. Every morning he would rush to his job. But one day there was rain, He slipped in front of his train, There used to be a student named Bob.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's hotter than a woman who is face down and ass up? A woman who isn't tying her shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did Bob drop his ice cream? Because he got hit with a super models TIttys

thumb_up thumb_down -23

It's green, has four legs and sits in a tree. And if it falls on your head you're dead. A billiard table.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A White, a Black, and a Hispanic man walk into a bar. They sit down and have a nice conversation, tip their bartender and then leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops