whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

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This is an anti- joke

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What does the fox say? A scream-y howl. A shrill, hoarse scream of anguish, it sounds more than anything like a human baby undergoing some kind of physical torture.

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what do you call a clown in makeup? a clown, clowns are supposed to wear makeup.

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What do you get a kid with no arms for Christmas? Hungry, Hungry Hippos.

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If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he...

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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Awe the sky is crying.... No it's peeing

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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What do you do when you come across a dead baby? Add it to your collection.

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If God created the world, including man kind, why do we worship him? We are corrupt, selfcentered, animal slaughterers. He made us this. So, Why?

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swag

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I'm not wearing underwear. Why? Because I have built in underwear. :)

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What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

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What did the sphinx say to the Minotaur? Nothing, as they are fictional creatures and in according to probable science, don't not exist.

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What do you call a person who hammers a nail into his forehead? A dumbass.

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Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

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Q: What do you call those assholes who always volunteer in lectures? A: Assholes. Fcuking assholes. They created the word asshole. Assholes

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

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Ms Leong Sux

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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