Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

Why did the chicken cross the road ( The chicken says) I dream of a world where a chicken can cross the road without having morals questioned.

Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A refrigerator.

A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

There is a 5 second long and extremely depressing video, most cant watch it for any longer than 6 seconds

A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

Jehovas Witnesses: Summer vacation edition reality show: BItch: Do you know Jesus? Guy: Goddammit you A*Beep*SSHOLES again! I keep telling you all this is m0thertrucking Spain, I know like 500 Jesus`s living in this town alone! *slams door* Moral: Everybody knows at least something about the goddamn Jesus! Ill try asking "Is he the guy that lives downstairs?" Next time and see what happens.

Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

Holy shit Lawman! Next thing we know Nero comes back from the death! Seriously get over here stat and get "my men" under control here! So that last damn Moral was for you! I never understood why he picked me, so he never picked me at all... Man am I relieved! Do you ever fucking get tired of playing the hero? I basically ended up declaring war on Nero`s on people here, what should I do?

whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

what do you wear at a funeral? white. lol jk black

A ninja is walking down the street then he...finds a puppy a names him rex

why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

whats worse than watching your house burn to the ground? Sarah Palin becoming president

Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" "Two dead kittens."

Youu might be a Jew if you........take part in a weekly service at your local synagogue.

You know whats worse than an anti-joke? Practically Anything.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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