What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did peter shake the baby? To kill it and rape its dead corpse

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

yo momma so ugly that yo your birth certifiicate is an apology from thew condem factory

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Micheal Curran...that is all.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Person 1: *sneeze Person 2: bless you Person 1: I'm jewish. They never spoke again.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

who's a knob,a liar, and systematically ruining a once well-run family football club by employing crooks , buying footballers who are well-passed there sell-out date and getting the team relegated ? steve kean not laughing ? nor are 23 ,000 others

thumb_up thumb_down -28

ALCATRAZ IS REOPENED!

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the doctor not make it to his appointment in time? Because he died in 9/11!

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What Do call a dog with an e A doge

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

thumb_up thumb_down -28

whats worst then dieng in a videogame

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Rose are red Violets are blue all I what to know is what do that mouth do

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why didnt Steve Jobs make an iphone 5? He died

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops